Heavy Is the Head: When Elevation Breeds Haters

0:00 What's going on, everybody? Welcome to another episode of the Kickback. I am the host, The Dude, and tonight's topic is, Heavy is the Head That Wears the Crown. Talking about all the things that we carry through life and for life and how, it gets heavy from time to time. But as men, we're expected to carry it. And when we elevate and want to be someone different, the world still sees us as a version of yourself that they saw you as. And that's the biggest problem. how do we deal with or change people's view of us, i'm battling i'm battling with that right now as we speak and that's the reason why the title if you can't see the title says heavy is the head that wears the crown, and the question i have tonight is how do you deal with people who can't see past the old version of you.

1:04 If you can't see, if you still talk to me and deal with me as if I'm the old person, you got a rude awakening coming or I probably am going to remove myself. Because I don't, man, one thing about me, I've been out here four plus years, man. And it's a wrap come 2027 for explaining things in multiple ways and several times. If you don't get it, then I'm not the one to give it to you. I just got to pray for you and hope you get it sooner rather than later because, time is of the essence, man. It's crazy because it beat people that you think would know better. It beat people that you think would be on the same frequency now that they older because we all older.

1:49 You feel me? So it's just a shame for real when it's that way. You know, people still think you're that old person. People still try to ask you. Right. And it's it's you will hurt yourself right but then it's also the version of you that people you know now have made up in your in their minds of you, but it's not actually you and it's like they made up a version of you to try to compensate for the, the lack of in their life whether it's lack of confidence whether it's lack of sense whether it's lack of whatever and people want to try to bring you down to their levels.

2:33 We've talked about this before, but you also mentioned the Dick Gregory reel, and my wife brought it to my attention yesterday. She says, babe, it's like you put on a pair of glasses that only you can see the world from your perspective. Your higher power gave that to you. The rest of the world can't see how you see the world, but they want you to come back down to their face. Yeah people don't know how to people don't know how to accept the fact that you're not on their level no more so they in small ways try to get you to stoop back down instead of respecting the fact that you've transcended you've elevated, because they.

3:17 I can't explain it for them man but some people are comfortable and complacent man you gotta be not be happy for folks but you gotta let let people be, right you gotta be and let be you know what I mean live and let live, I was here this week I was here with this week oh Joe think he better than us because he got his stuff together he think he better than us and I'm like you don't know the path that I had to walk down to get to where I'm at right now exactly, they don't know how many steps you've taken how long your journey has been Yeah.

3:58 And how much you've changed. And the fact that you're still changing. Why they talking about where you at currently. Right. You know what I'm saying? Just imagine when God bless you with more. Then what they're going to be saying, you know? It's that fence that we always talk about, man. You know, people dwell in a gray area. And some people know which side that they reside on. But facts are black and white, my brother. there's no gray area in facts right right right, there's no gray area in facts but the fact of the fact that your insecurities, and your lack of drive wheel determination, makes me something else because you don't have the same drive you don't have the same wheel as i have So because I have drive, I have will, I have determination.

4:54 Oh, now I got the big head and I think I'm better than you. Yeah, man. That's they self-conscious. That's really all it is. They self-conscious and they don't know how to hold themselves accountable. Because when you see somebody you know doing better in life after a time period. It makes you reflect on where you're at now. At one point in time, the scales were even. Right. But now, and it's not even like a scale, but it's like y'all was dwelling in the same community. And now you're no longer in that community. But the fact of the matter is we still, I'm just going to be real with you. These are my coworkers that have said this about me.

5:39 And I didn't even know these people before I got this job. And like I said my drive, my will, my determination irritates them it makes them feel some type of way about me because I'm a go-getter and they're complacent, now one of the sayings is if he ain't got no haters, he ain't popping. If he ain't got no haters he ain't popping man I don't know I, stay away from negativity honestly right I try not to tend to anything that doesn't land on my doorstep right but if it lands on your doorstep then, I'm sure I'm confident that you know how to articulate your words carefully to not let them slide but also be graceful in your approach, of course my brother but it's still irritating knowing like i drive through my old years every night, i drive in the community i grew up in every night and i see where i came from, i see where i where i i i made it from to where i live at now and it's like, i ain't i'm no better than you but i'm not complacent i want better god just elevated me, and you deliberately moved forward a lot of people take a million steps in place,

7:10 versus deliberately moving forward and when you don't yeah and when you realize you feel me the mic drop is when you see somebody who's actually took steps forward, but you feel like you don't took way more steps than them but you've been in place the whole time. You've been walking around in circles while a person actually been taking a path forward, it's hurtful man you know it's a it's an emotional regulation thing it's one of those things where you have to emotionally regulate because if not you're gonna be labeled as a hater, sorry to say but you're a hater if you don't know how to congratulate if you don't know how to congratulate what the what our grandparents say if you ain't got that nice to say don't say nothing at all, don't say nothing at all and it's sad to see grown folks, wrong folks that's really when i gotta move around when it's grown folks, we're talking about all of this mess ain't nobody had nothing nice to say about me so i guess i shouldn't talk at all they ain't had nothing nice to say about me here lately hey man.

8:18 Let you know you're doing something to rub folks the wrong way but you're doing the right thing it's crazy when you do the right thing and it rub people the wrong way, right and that's that's the part that's puzzling me i ain't doing them but going to work doing my job doing what's, of me for calling my job duties yeah i'm doing a little extra here and there, but then my co-workers oh he think he's better than us he think he did he think he better i'm like wait y'all can do the same shit animals. Y'all can make the same moves I'm nature. But I realize they're complacent in where they are. They're okay with what they got coming to me. I'm not okay. I get the same thing.

9:01 I get that. I done had that same thing before for my family members, man. I had to emotionally regulate for real because if not, like I had anger problems. So once I see some BS, I got to go and move around because you ain't even going to be able to handle my tongue if I really just come, how I become. So like, you know, it speaks to your character, man. You know, it's one of those things where, You analyze and it further clarifies your vision. You know. It's amazing how God turns ugly situations into blessings. Blessings in disguise, you know what I mean? Because when you know how to respond gracefully and continue to move forward.

9:50 And stand your ground while not being offensive, that's all praise be to the Most High. And those are opportunities for you to do that. The test as well because a lot of people grow arrogant with wealth and riches and abundance and then they take an opportunity like that and be like, and then to start talking down on people instead of being like hey man you know you're doing the same thing i'm doing the same thing that you could be doing, you see i'm saying the difference between those two responses, right well y'all ain't because i try not to be i work more on being non-judgmental now like i could would say something about my brothers. I could be teed off about this, that, and the third and what they not doing and what I feel like they should have been able to provide for me when I came home, but I don't know what they going through in life.

10:40 I don't know what their journey is at the moment and I can't be all high and mighty like I ain't never struggled before. So like it's a test, man, but it's also an opportunity, man. A test are opportunities to either rise or fall, man. I want to congratulate you for being able to hold yourself in that moment. And that's what my wife said. My wife said it's a test from God. She said he's testing me. Like you said, she said there's a blessing coming, and this is a test, and there's a lesson that I have to learn through this.

11:20 And when I learned the lesson, I passed the test that my God had tested me with. And there'd be more blessings on the way. That'd be a test because if you were in the past that test and remember your most high, in order to articulate yourself, it probably would have delayed a blessing on the way for you. But you might have just sped it up. You hear me? Yeah, yeah. You might have just sped that thing up because, you know what I'm saying? Man, it's crazy how, People who haven't got they self together and people who also just stand on the opposite side completely. You know, it's sad that they try to turn.

12:02 A good thing into an ugly thing, man. It's like, it's toxic to me. I back away from all toxic and drama for real. Like when people have negative mind frames like it, I try to be, you know, graceful, but at the same time, I'm not finna waste my breath either. You know what I'm saying? So I got to gauge how, how low they being at the moment to see if I even want to indulge because at the end of the day, my ashes don't speak louder than my words. Most definitely. And you can't get caught up in the mud all the time. Sometimes you make a scratch worse by scratching on it versus just leaving it be. Very true. I've done it so many times, my brother. You just don't understand.

12:44 Man, we all help. That's great. You know, you just be digging and you get to get you. Then you get to dig and to dig. And then the next thing you know, you look at it, it's bleeding. It wasn't bleeding. The man's bleeding. He sure. it's just nas bleeding blood hair workers you want to quit scratching right, it's just you know in elevation and the other thing i learned is when you when you elevate and when you when you raise higher through your higher power, people villainize you oh yeah man they make you out to be the bad guy i told you it was mind-blowing for me to see it because i'm fresh out of prison trying to do good.

13:28 I've been going to school, working, getting jobs, and staying out the way and being independent versus being a burden. Y'all seem to have an attitude with that. Y'all think I feel like I'm better than y'all? I'm trying to pave the way for all of us to do better. Y'all think I'm trying to stand on y'all and say, what is wrong, y'all? It's crazy, man. It's really wild, man, because you just see how backwards society is, man. You know what I mean? It hurts that It's not common for our communities to unite, but that's reality. It's not common for black people to have fruitful conversations, but it's our reality.

14:09 You know what I'm saying? Versus us bonding and unifying and working together to all rise. It's people who want to talk about you instead of trying to ask you what you got going on so they can clarify their own little plan. You know, I found out, I figured that out in my current job. Because coming from where I came from, family-oriented, family togetherness, work together. One was down. We lifted each other up. We moved. We moved as one pretty much all the time. You know, you got that one straggle out there, but we kept it all wrangled in.

14:50 These motherfuckers, yeah, these better motherfuckers, yeah. Oh, Lord, Jesus. If you don't like it, then why are you still here? Yeah, man. It's really sad, man. I stay away from all drama toxicity. I ain't never seen people getting so mad when you do your job. Why are you doing it? It's my job. What do you mean? Right. No, you're doing too much. You need to sit down somewhere. I stay away from that because you have to be careful when you stooping lower in order to try to rise somebody up. You know what I mean? you have to be careful with that because it's a sensitive situation. You're putting yourself at risk indulging in things that are beneath you.

15:37 But if you got good intentions and trying to ride somebody up, that's a good thing too. There's nothing wrong with that, but you got to be very careful, man, because some people say something and then as the saying goes in jail, somebody's driving you like a car they taking your wheel and they just throwing it any kind of way they want to they they touch they throw a line out there you bite and now they just pulling you along, and for you know you look up and you weigh in the gutter somewhere trying to explain something to somebody who was way you ain't had no business turning around looking in your rearview mirror wow. Man that's deep that's deep you know because bubble said a long time ago we talked about he said why is the windshield what how do you go bubble about the mirror and the windshield some smaller than others, the windshield is bigger than the review mirrors that's it, windshield is bigger than the review mirror yep yep, yep i said in one of my songs man i said I said, foot up on the gas, and I broke the reviews off.

16:43 Hate you when you broke, but they love when you were boss. You feel me? It's crazy how people, and I don't know, man. It's hard to be having. I'm glad we got this space because this is one of the only places we can have these conversations, man. But being real, man. You know what I'm saying? We just having real conversations here, man. We couldn't. We just said, man. You and the dude could not have these conversations at our workplace. And we work with grown-ass people. When I say grown-ass people, I mean some grown-ass people that's older than us. And we still can have a couple of things. Yeah, man. How you think I feel when I'm trying to look up to people for inspiration?

17:26 Uh-huh. And then they show me that their attitude is way out of line. I'm better off just staying out their way and doing my job and keep on pushing versus indulging because I know it's almost like it's, you know, once people show you signs, it's almost like, You know, you can't even talk to them until you see them in a better light. Because if I, you already done show me that you, you, you, this is where you're dwelling at. So I got to stay away from you until I catch you in another environment and then be like, hey man, what's up, man? You know, we've been working, you know what I'm saying? And then you can try to, it's a, it's a, the environment nurtures the conversation that you want to have versus you forcing the conversation that you already see.

18:14 Ain't no point in having it. Man, that is... It seems like there's a lot of that going on. It is a lot of that going on. I'm like, then you ask yourself, is you in the same conversation as me? Did you hear the same thing? And it's getting even worse. Are you even on the same planet as me? I mean, hold on. It's getting even worse, man, because... I say it to myself all the time. I know. There ain't no way in the world you could have got the same books I got. No. You couldn't have got the same books I got. Y'all know about the Pioneer age right yes yeah okay in today's world versus the pioneer age, majority of society is consumers yes and when you are overly consuming things you become subjective to what someone is what someone else is providing for you and it makes you, into a person that you may not even want to be but you or look up and you're already too deep in.

19:17 A lot of people are just consuming and not producing. A lot of people are being shaped by any given moment. It's sad to say, but a lot of people out here can be your right-hand man, but a change and be ready to kill you. Like I just watched this movie on Netflix called The Gray Man about a CIA agent that they tried to kill because now he knows too much. But really it was a coup that was being happening in the midst of the CIA. But some guys who just pulled up on a plane, waiting on him so that he can extract him, got a call and now all of a sudden they trying to kill him. And I'm just like, how can people flip their mind like that?

19:58 But it's like, is this really what goes on? Whether it's an order from above, from someone higher ranking, or it's just personal self-interest. It's not people that you can actually trust out here, man. I was just thinking about earlier this week, what you just said. How we begin Because back in the pioneer Back in the olden days In the pioneer age You know. If you felt like You was being treated unfairly Your goods that you were selling Was unfair You're like no Don't worry about, it Give me what you If you work for somebody And you feel like they're treating Just give me what you owe And I'm done And the whole community Gonna come behind you too, The whole community Gonna come behind you About a wrong being Now it's, Now it's the I can't lose this job. Hold on.

20:53 When you found this job, you were looking for a job, right? Yes, sir. You know what I'm working on? I'm working on building my relationship with God. Yes. My most high. Amen. Because in my lonely times, and when I feel like I'm different and it's becoming offensive, I have to correct myself. And I got to learn how to have more conversations with the most high. You feel me? Smoke me one and talk to him and chill and kick it and have a good time because sometimes that'd be the only thing you got, man. No? That'd be the only thing you got until Friday when the kickback come on. For real. I heard that, brother.

21:36 For real, man. And then when you get blessed with a spouse, with a woman that's a partner and a teammate, man, I had to grow into realizing how valuable my spouse is, my significant other is, because, in my lowest moments, when my future is not clear, through the thick and the thin, through the ups and the downs, through the mud and at the mountaintop, she be right there encouraging me, holding me accountable. Yeah. Amen. And that's serious, man. I stand on it, man. But let me get with y'all in a second, man. I'm going to get back on here. I'm going to make my slide right quick and then I'm jumping back on. Okay. Alright.

22:21 Bro, ask your girl if I can... Yeah, but I... The title is, Head is the Head that Ways the Crown. And what I reason why I made it that is because this week I was told the people that I work with, told my supervisor that because I do the things I do I think I'm better. I like jealousy to me, I'm going to give you an example of what happened. So one of my coworkers, she brings her son to work. She's babying him.

23:08 She made a statement saying, he's a little slow. He's autistic. He's going to need me when he grows up, so I got to keep my baby close. I'm not going to let him leave the house. I said, just because he's autistic doesn't mean you cannot grow up. Right. Just making it worse handicapping them even more so exactly because if the good mother called you home tomorrow what are you going to do, there you go right there what are you going to, do what are you going to do she got upset with me because I told her I said you do too much you're babying this boy I understand he's a little boy but you got to let him have some independence you got to teach him, how to survive in this world, man the best show i ever seen to demonstrate that was ray what what ray charles mama did with him right y'all remember seeing that movie yes.

24:11 Yeah yeah yeah she she she it was tough on her but she she made and i know it's just a movie or whatever but it's a a demonstration of what should actually happen, you gotta you gotta you gotta be tough on where they can make it on their own and when i I say tough. I mean, you got to, they got to, you think about it, it's difficulty, you know, different challenges and be able to overcome them, you know? Yeah. But now, what you experience is that's the now. No, my baby can't do that. They can't do this. They can't do that. And then you go and send them to this institution that we call education.

24:56 You go send them to a building to get some education about this. And they put some structure in and some wall and some guardrails in and oh my goodness, off come the rails. And then you go up there and you go up there and show you're natural so they expect everything that they do should be this should be okay because, my mama and my dad have defended me I know I was right I'm always right sure, Until that very child turns on you and busts you in your head. I'm sure. Now you want to talk. Right. Because y'all came in and me and Tamar was talking.

25:42 And I said, you know, when God elevates you and he gives you a discernment and you can see things. And it's like this. When God puts those rose colored glasses on your eyes and you see the world totally different and you see people messing up and doing things, they villainize you. They weaponize the fact that you can see things that they can't see. And we also are talking about how people are complacent with where they are at work. I'm a go getter. I got off at seven thirty tonight. I literally have been on my bus. I got on my bus at five thirty this morning. I ran my walk out. I did a field trip. I did my afternoon route, and I did my afternoon program.

26:30 So I make sure my family's in a good place, but some of my immediate coworkers, they're completely, I'm okay with what I got. I ain't doing none of that. I don't want nothing extra. But they don't want to talk about it. They don't have no drive. So what I'm telling me is I got drive, wheel, and determination. Let me ask you something, Joe. let me ask you something about those particular co-workers. Are there season? How long they been there? Damn. The ones I'm talking about, I've been there longer than them. Okay, okay, okay. Now you got something that's been there longer than you to go say the same thing.

27:10 They just won't say it out loud. Don't act like you don't, because I know you do. I'm probably sure. I'm not going to dispute or debate. I want to know, when did we take... Drive and, when did we take drive out of humanity that you wanted to gain more? You wanted more. You wanted more out of your life. You wanted more out of your kids. You wanted more out of your family. When did we take that away? When did we just take that away and just say, I'm good. I'm just good with settling. I don't want to go no far. I'm good right here. Man, that kills me.

27:54 That kills me. Man, I can't do it. But Mark said it weeks ago, about a month ago, that we think six steps ahead of the average person. That mean you being better than everybody then? Is that what that mean? No. It just means I see the mood before you started painting them. You should not catch up to where I'm at. That's a good question. That was good. I love that. That was good. That make me better than you because i can see six steps ahead. I think i think a little bit shorter down the road right right right, yeah they make it they make it they make it they make it like it's a bad thing you know, to want more to be you know to be ambitious about being best you know ambitious yeah ambitious yeah, but I'm right now one of the hatedest people at our job oh yeah and I don't even see why I'm hated by my co-workers but I'm hated on all sides the administration co-workers, hmm.

29:14 Yeah it's unfortunate it's because your pursuit of the greater view that's all it is it's basically it's the same thing we're talking about, yeah you know elevation when when god elevates you and he puts you in a different position in life that other people can't see, it it puts a mirror in front of you and they can't, most people can't stand and look at you for us, right right if you look in the mirror and you don't like what's looking back then you gotta change what's looking back cause the mirror ain't gonna change, you the only person that can change it right I'm not changing you gotta change that's the only person that can change it that person in the mirror only way your reflection changes is if you change it yeah, yeah you gotta change you gotta stop doing what you doing you gotta stop, you get what I'm saying right okay I get what you're saying yeah stand in the mirror stand in the mirror look at yourself what do you see you see you right okay, put a hat on your head did that did that change, no off.

30:31 I always do have a say. See what I'm saying? See what I'm saying? I need you to stop making me look bad. That's the point right there. There it is right there. Yeah, there it is. That's it right there. Stop making me look bad. So the question arises. Now do I allow, this person to change who I really am or or put me in a box of who I really am, to make them feel comfortable or to make them feel valuable or what? What do I do?

31:19 I mean, I want friends. I don't want to make enemies, but what do I do? At this point, that's what I'm going to tell you. I'll take, this. If you were any I could see you coming. Yeah. Everything you just said, Riley, is what I've been, doing. what do i do with this situation so i just start right you know i just gotta shoot i just start praying, right right right that's a start that's a good start that's a good start because you're gonna get you're gonna get your answer it's gonna be revealed you know, right that's all you can do that's all that's all you can do that's all i've been doing for months now that's all because it's how you can do it's just praying and just thank god, come on now something i mean hey you gotta open somebody's eyes, right and that's you just said it john you just said right there you got to open somebody's eyes because the reality to that you are who you are you are who what god made you, and pray that somebody's eyes will be open like wait a minute, No, they don't like that. You ask too much.

32:42 I'm just kidding. You ask too much. Man, let me tell you something. Look, y'all hear some good nuggets right here. I got a friend that I went to, that I worked with for years at the shared department. And he was young. And that dude used to come to work bringing blueprints to work on on building houses, and they talked about him man that dude they talked about him like he was a dog they said oh he ain't gonna do nothing with that, he think he gonna do that he think he gonna get away from the sheriff office and and do this and do that and he he talked about his his business a lot because he was so excited and enthusiasm and ambition about what he was trying to do, he left the share department, and now he's a millionaire, hey I ain't no millionaire but I'm wealthy the Lord has made me wealthy but, that story you just told right there Riley same I've been through, this ain't the first time I've been through something like this but the story you just told when I was cooking my last cooking job, my last cooking job said I told him I was gonna leave I wanted to start driving and they was like.

34:02 And you know how people talk and somebody called me was like, you know, they said you ain't going to make it. You know, they said you'll be back. You know, they said. Doubt talking. Yeah. You should have never left. You should have stayed here. Six months after I left that job. Do you know that the company sold that building and all of those people lost their jobs? Mm. Mm. Mm. See? See? Yeah. Tell you, man, what God has for you, he has for you, you know? What God has for you, he has for you. Can't nobody stop that. Right. I went to God and I came to my wife and we talked about it. And my wife said, if you want to make the move, baby, make the move.

34:43 God's already giving you your answer. Make the move. And I jumped off of that ship that was sinking and moved on. And all those people tried to see that. And hang in. and God. That's the way I'm put because it was a sinking ship, yes but you know it's like you know you help people you go out of your way you do things for them to, stab you in the back and say oh you think you know I ain't too good, like before I don't know if y'all was here when me and Jamara was talking they don't know the steps it took for me to get here they don't understand how my feet hurt I've been up all day and I'm here with you guys right now but I've been up all day, yeah yeah I mean just like, it's just like what it is Joe it's just like you one of us why you leaving, ain't it so good here why you running.

35:46 Why you gonna run for masks it's good here ain't it eating three meals a day why you one of us why you think you gotta go You know what, Riley? You're being facetious, but you're spot on. You're spot on. You are spot on. People at that building, at my last cooking job, that was the mentality that they had. You are spot on. You are spot on, brother. When I say that was exactly what you just said was their mentality. That's it. The mentality thing. The mentality thing. It is. You know what? You saying that now I'm thinking about it and that's why these conversations are always good because that gives me a different perspective. It's a mentality thing.

36:36 These people have these mentalities and I don't have it. I don't dwell in that world that they dwell. Right. Because see, your mentality have broadened. You have exceeded their mentality. Their mentality. You see what I'm saying? Like I said, the ambition, the drive. We talked about drive early, the drive. And it's like, you know, it's a mentality thing, man. They don't see it. They don't see it. And, you know, I'm like, because I listen, because we work in close quarters like you and your coworkers. We work in close quarters.

37:17 So you have conversations with people. They tell you about their lives. They tell you about their kids. They tell you about their spouses. They tell you about all of this. And I told my wife yesterday, I said, because I work and it is what it is. I work with majority win. I work with majority win. And so I told my wife I said I think they are jealous of my relationship because they talk about the men that they deal with and how they ain't no good and, how they how they doing all of this and and I said me and my wife like today, today was payday for us and I was sitting down with two of my co-workers in between schools and one of my co-workers was like, I just applied for a new job. I need more money.

38:06 I need more money. I ain't got no spouse. I said, I paid half of my check went to bills today and I still got the half my check left over because you got a wife and you a good man and I ain't got no good men in my life. And I'm like, is that my fault? No, but there's a reason for it. Yeah, it is, ain't it? There's definitely a reason for that. Hey, Joe, I got a question, man. When you were speaking about the job that you had cooking and you decided to leave, did you know the ship was sinking at that time? No. No. I didn't find out until after I got off.

38:47 Okay. All right. But you did say you prayed to God about the decision that you was making. Yes. Yeah. I prayed to God about it. Yeah. Yeah. And he guided you out of that sinking ship. Yeah. I prayed to God that I was making the right move because I went from cooking, 20 years of cooking. I went from 20 years of cooking to driving. Two, totally different areas. right, well you know when when riley said that you know you had a different mentality, you also got to remember that human nature plays a factor in a lot of people's decisions because people get accustomed, to a certain thing it's like you can be so you can be uh socialized by prison, you know you've been in prison so long, so you know when you come out you can't function in normal society because it's too too much freedom not enough control institutionalized right institutionalized so sometimes your co-workers you know they get accustomed to the paycheck they got they got their bills worked out around it they know how much they're going to make they know exactly how far they can go they can they know how much they can party how much they can and and that becomes their normal and they buy into that normal lifestyle they buy into that circumstance and they don't think outside of that they become a prisoner of their own situation, right yeah because they think they're making it oh i'm good i'm making it you know yeah.

40:23 Yeah i don't see anything wrong with that i'm not that's if that's the way you want to live that's the way you want to live, but that's the job that i needed to elevate i needed to move people are afraid to change too that's the other thing, Change is a big thing for some people. And if you can't, those circumstances have to change, They don't know what the change is going to be like. They allow fear to be that factor that prevents them from flying, you know, going higher. Like that old expression goes, you know, you can't you can't fly like an eagle when you're hanging around with jerky.

41:08 Right. Sometimes it's best to just stay on the ground. Yeah, you won't fall if you if you just stay on the ground. You won't have to worry about falling. That brings me to a story that I was told some years back about a guy that was mountain climbing. And, you know, when you're climbing on the mountain, you have to tie off. You have to put that, drive that bolt into the rock as a safety precaution. If you slip and fall, that's going to catch you before you crash and hit rock bottom. The guy was climbing.

41:49 And his partner couldn't go on any further because of the altitude. But he wanted to keep going. And he kept going. And he pushed beyond his own limits. And he fell. He didn't know how far he had fallen. And then when he woke up, he was hanging there. And he knew that he couldn't stay there. But he was too afraid to make a move and go down. And they found him there because of fear. He didn't move and he died. And when they found him he was like six feet from the ledge oh man golly wow golly that's, how powerful fear is it really is it can it can freeze your momentum it can stop you from going forward and it can it can be your demise right i remember when i was in that truck underwater, water i could have freaked out and froze and drowned, right but god gave me a different spirit, and i got the heck out of there so right you know that fear is a real thing but it's fear is only an it's a feeling fear can't kill you, unless you give into it but let me ask you this very very clear can fear also be a motivator, Most definitely. Yeah. If you have that kind of mindset, fear is a motivator.

43:12 I'm afraid of failure, so I'm going to do well. I'm afraid that if I don't get an A, I'm going to come home and I'm going to beat the brakes off of me. That's right. That's right. That's right. And instead make you face it head on. Exactly. I'd rather face you than face my mama or face my daddy. I know that right. You know what I always say I always say this outside of my house I didn't have no bullets because I had a bullet at home I mean I was worried about more worried about the people at home than I was at school I'm sorry y'all don't scare me, I know what's waiting for me at home and you ain't it you can't even hold the camera you I can hit back at home I can't do that so you're not good at some of that stuff that I've been trying to give out at home.

44:09 You ain't got no extension cord in your hand. Yeah, I remember that. Extension cord. Hot Wheels track. How you gonna beat me with my own Christmas gift? Man, Ben P. You're gonna enjoy me in the box. I got on the school bus with a Hot Wheels track. My friends mess with me about that to this day on the bus, in on the bus she beat me all the way from the door to the bus to the front of the door, all the way to my seat, Got tracks from a track. Right. That'd be good. With the box.

44:56 With the box? Yeah. Yeah. Man, them was the days. Yeah, you know. Them days when they say, this gonna hurt me more than guards, you know it ain't. No, it ain't. Don't even perpetrate that. You just told the story that's what you did this is not going to hurt you as much as it's going to hurt me right you're not going in and sit down I'm going in and inch down, your feelings might be hurt but my butt is hurt right I've seen you got to go do the dishes what you talking about.

45:39 It's been puzzling to me, man, just how how the mentality of some people are and how they try to drag you down because they don't want to get up. Exactly. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Misery loves company. Yeah. Because of my fear of moving forward. I feel more comfortable if I have people around me, even if the ship is going down. I'm not thinking about myself. Right. I got somebody to go with me. Right. no I want us to all I want us to all get up together and move together no no sir no sir no sir, you be in the same place I'm at five days a week and collectively how many people you know gonna ride gonna say that we got it good here why you wanna do that you gotta shoot, they were swearing down we got it good, Riley you hit the nail on the head with that one I swear Riley you sure you wasn't on the bus with us you sure you.

46:51 I've been on that kind of bus before you'd have been on some of them side conversations with us, why you want to rock that boat what you mean cause the boat taking on water that's why I want to rock the boat yeah. I can't understand this is what gets me you had you on the job and you got another brother, you know all the kinfolk ain't kinfolk but you got another brother that's working on the same job with you and then they want you to do something illegal against the rules that you can get in trouble for to help them, right why why do you and then and then when i don't comply to your request now i'm an uncle tom or i wasn't down or you ain't you ain't you ain't one of the crew no right not one of, the crew i'm trying to move ahead i'm trying to get ahead in life for me and my family and i'm not going to risk that to help you, when it's when it's not up above board and honest but see the fact of the matter is i get what you're saying but what about when you're called all of that, and you're doing good and you're helping somebody and you're doing right and you still get called all of that, oh yeah hey look we i think most of us have been there and done that and that's again, people are people are gonna be people and that's expression life be life and so ain't nothing you can do it's a stand on right trust in the lord with all

48:22 your heart and lean not to your own understanding and all your ways acknowledge him that's it that's right yeah, that's right that's it that's it man that's it right now i'm telling you that's your best friend if you let him be that's it. In any situation in any arena on any stage that's including in the church. And look, I was underway on the ship. We were gone. We was away from home port. We had been gone for about four months. We would actually be gone a total of six months, but this was at the four-month stage. And I'm in Baltimore. My home port is in Virginia.

49:06 I'm stuck in Baltimore in the yard, and they ship the mail from Portsmouth to Baltimore. So I'm processing the mail. That was one of my jobs. I had several. That was one of them. And I'm going to the mail and I'm looking at this piece of correspondence from the housing office back in Portsmouth. And so I open his address to the commanding officer. I open the letter. I review it before I give it to the XO who gives it to the captain if he need to. And it's about one of the brothers on the ship and they go kick him out of housing. And it says there's been several complaints made noise complaints late at night, coming from your unit and we're going to have to remove you from government housing man, and they and they had to put in parentheses the noise was of a sexual nature, oh man we're away from home so either, this brother's wife is in there having a tool time party or she got somebody else up in there with her yeah.

50:10 But I mean even if she's at a school time party she ain't got to make that much noise come on now yeah. I gotta counsel the brother and let him know what's going on that's also part of one of my jobs I call the brother to my office I sit him down I read the letter to him and I know how to say look bro, there's something going on back in Portland back at home you need to call home and find out what's going on do you know he got mad at me, as the bearer of the bad news bad news he got mad at me i wasn't the one making the noise right right right right, But you But you were the lamp in the message Yeah.

50:58 Shoot the barrel of bad news, man Shoot the message You can take it Nobody likes the barrel of bad news, So So when we say that That means nobody likes the truth, There you go I want to live in ignorance Ignorance is bliss Give me a lie any day, right? Give me a lie any day Especially if it makes me feel good That's right. Sugar. Make it sweet. Got diabetes. Last year. Now they're going to chop your feet off. Now they're going to chop your feet off. Man. But that goes back to, that's the leaving a father and correcting this lady about her son.

51:40 This is where it all started at. She corrected this lady about her son and what she said about her son. And her wanting to enable him throughout the rest of his life. So because I told her the truth about this situation, she started on a campaign to damage my character. Smile in my face. Say hello. Talk to me. And that's premeditation. Yes, sir. That's premeditation. He's setting a trap. He's laying a trap. Laying a trap for you. Hey, the boys told you in the song, can't trust the big button to smile.

52:26 It ain't going to be one of them traps. If you own the rules. Hey. She got a man at home. she didn't lay down all the stuff back and forth at home oh man, and see that's the other part of it you talk about and I'm not gossiping I'm just this is all, in just in conversation context is what I this is all in context but you said at a table, excuse me full of your co-workers and say my man ain't doing and A, B, and C. So I didn't put his name on the lease. So if he ever acts up, I can put him out.

53:10 On this money to pay the business. I'm in control of my house. Right. That's not a real relationship. That's a convenience. Yeah, man. Folks, you had the old Terry Motives the whole time. You didn't even try to see if plan A can work. You already focused on playing. Billing out. Billing out. Got that golden parachute ready. See, I ain't married yet, but I think when we get to talking about a prenuptial agreement that'll let me know anything I need to know about you for real that I haven't found out already because if your face twitched or anything, I need a what they call it I need a polygraph I need a polygraph.

53:56 I need a polygraph before I sign my name on that dotted line hey girl I got to know this is real I got to know it's to the great because I don't even want a divorce. Right. I don't want to think of that unless it's just absolutely the right thing to do. It doesn't got to that point. So are we better off separate than together? You shouldn't even be thinking like they're going into a marriage. You should be thinking about we finished. This thing is to the end. This lady's not trying to marry this man. This lady's not trying to marry this man. No. But It's just a matter of convenience.

54:38 He's getting the milk and she's getting the steer. Yeah. You got to watch E-Women for real, man, because they be scandalous, man. The 2026, man, it's so bad out here, man. I almost wish I could. I was born way before the end when I was born because it was so many more values and tech back in the 90s, man. Yeah. And amongst the struggle of our people, there were so many values that were intact. Whereas now, you got your grandkids cussing. They know more about the iPad and iPhone than they do their own family. Yeah.

55:20 They know more about the iPad and the iPhone than the book. Man, man. What you talking about? The book is on the iPad and the iPhone. That's a sad situation, right? The grandkids are cussing because the grandmama's 32. Yep, yep, yep. With the grandmama, the grandmama is trying to be like the young ones. You know, they dressing just like the young ones because they probably are young. But I mean, you know what? I saw that mess, man. And I hate to see that, like, it's like as soon as a young lady gets pregnant nowadays, like, they need jerk reactionists to panic and break up with the man.

56:03 So the child support seems like more security than actually having the father of the child in the picture. It's like, I don't understand how you get pregnant and now everything goes left. This is when everything is supposed to be rejuvenated and stricken. Right. Well, all it is is when they shot. Oh, I'm saying what's going on? It's supposed to be a little tighter, but instead you're thinking of plan B. Yeah, yeah. Again, that's the trick of the enemy, and that's the society speaking. Yeah. You know, even looking at the pro athletes today, whether it's baseball, basketball, football, they want to interview. You know, you go through the draft, especially the NFL draft.

56:45 Right. They'll interview mama. Daddy will be sitting right there. They won't ask daddy nothing. No, they won't. The NFL wants to perpetuate this idea that young, strong black men don't have fathers. A father has been in their life. And it's such an incredible NFL story that this boy grew up without a father and now he's the star wide receiver of the NFL franchise when his father's been there every step of the way. They don't want to tell that story. They don't want to talk about how the father coasting in pop warner coasting through middle school coaching in high school they don't want to hear that right yeah they don't want to hear it, they'd be amazed they'd be amazed when we still prevail to medical christy yeah you gotta watch this stuff man they gotta watch it tell you yeah man it's crazy man and when you elevate your mind man, like i remember i used to have hoop dreams but.

57:40 Man, listen, man, it'll be a means to an end if I was to get drafted versus this is what my life is. I'm so glad and grateful that I'm able to entertain people on a daily basis by bouncing the ball. Or throwing the ball. Life is way more important and fast than a sport which is just entertainment. It's just entertainment. It's only for a season in your life because you can't do it for 40 years. So great. And then also with football, they talk about the damage that it does. There's some damage now. There's some damage.

58:21 There's some damage. on the mad concussion. I don't never forget that movie. This is where that folk call Rick was in right here. If you want to be king, you got to be able to stand on it. You got to be able to stand back. Man, I just want to wake up in the morning and take care of my livestock, man. That's all I want to do, man. Make sure my plants are looking good for a good old harvest this year. I'm trying to be chewing a straw. you're right chewing something, I got news saying ain't chewing too many straws right now right now they're chewing their fingernails because these are a 6.50 gallon and they pop on a whole lot of beefs.

59:06 We don't realize that everything can be done everything that is essential to our survival is free man, that's another thing about our people we don't know nothing about going outside and cutting the tree down there and building something, man. Planting the seed and watering that thing, man. It's so sad how slow niggas is, man. For real. I hate it, man, but it kills me for real, man, because like me and brother Joe was talking about earlier when we first got on the call. People are so much of consumers that. Lost when it comes to producing something. So you're a subject citizen now because you are dependent upon what I provide for you versus you being able to provide something for yourself.

59:52 That's the plan, my brothers. That's what I'm going to say. Public service announcement. Anything you go through, any produce you go through and buy now that has seeds in it, save your seeds. Because the industry is trying to go everything seedless so they can control the food and control the people so, so so let's say this and the saddest part to it we fund everybody other, a nationality but ourselves man we we fund everybody and we have the means to do that but we funding we're too busy funding everybody else man, and then the ones that make it a little bit, be so be so broken inside that they don't even want to heal, that they make a million justifications and excuses as to why they not, building something because if you know i can respect you not doing it for people that you thought you wanted to do it with but as long as you still doing it for instance building a community center for everybody versus just trying to go to the hood and pick some niggas up and show them how to do what you just did, building a community center is contribution enough for a guy like me because you tried versus, you talking about trying.

1:01:07 A lot of people get that money man that go buy a hundred chains christian dior uh chanel you don't even know these folks man, these folks is a billion dollar industry off of your dollar and you don't even know them they won't even let you dwell in the same room with them, but your whole outfit is chanel, come on now man miss me with that man i'm cool with a white tee i'm, cool with a white tee a pair of jeans something i can work in you're right, well i wish we could share i wish we could uh make a million of you and set you out on the street because unfortunately, you are the anomaly and uh yes, that that message definitely hasn't filtered down to the other younger brothers man man, i'm a i'm an exception to the rule out here man you're a true unicorn you know what they used to say i'm black man you a true unicorn what's the uh what's the saying uh back in the day where your backbone at man please, man people ain't got a spider they got a rubber band back here you mean a rubber, band they got they got a laugh at a laughy taffy back here you mean.

1:02:29 In the boss's pocket that's where my backbone at boss's pocket because as long as he keep cutting each other i'm getting it kind of way hey where are you saying I was like, hey, dude, over here, just eat her. You're supposed to eat her whole shit. When I started, to drive a little bit, and when I started to get to the end of the field, I said, when the people had that mentality, it dropped me. When I was just acting, I thought about that. When I thought about it, why is this thing left with me? Amen.

1:03:10 It's a sad story, man, because if the opportunity presented itself for real, you would see people's true colors where a lot of people would rather be subject, versus having their own will. And that's the cold, hard truth, man. Yeah. A lot of people would rather be subject, man. That's really disgusting to me. It's been hard. It's been a hard couple of years for me to realize. How dormant and how complacent people really are. I've always had an ambition to go public or the drive to do the best at whatever I'm doing. It didn't matter.

1:03:56 I ain't got to be the best. Let's just do my best at what I'm doing. I ain't never going to tell you I'm the best at it, but hey, I'm pretty good at what I do. Well, personal integrity and leadership go hand in hand. You can't have one without the other. And, you know, not everybody is born leader. Very small percentage of our population are born leaders. Most leaders come up through ranks as supporting us and they learn the leadership abilities from people that they emulate, and then when it's time for them to step into that role they do so like you know when Moses went off the scenes they learn how to serve first before they become a great leader, you follow until it was your turn to lead exactly but some people don't know how to follow which takes them out of a leadership, and then some people get so good at following they become too complacent and they're afraid to leave nah nah yeah man and then some are the people that's so bad that they don't even know how.

1:05:09 To follow they don't even know how to follow they're so used to chaos they don't even think they can't even keep cool what's going on Yeah, I'm not sure if you're good. To me don't want to too good to follow anybody every them wars will be looking for a Million dollars tomorrow. They just wanted to follow me now. They don't want to iron it. They just wanted to follow me now Ain't no way man. That ain't how life works my life so you mean so you want me to go work for this million dollars can't you just give it to how'd you just give it to, you already gas with me can't you just give me more.

1:06:04 It'd be so crazy because uh what you're not ready for even if you get blessed You're going to destroy your flesh, man. You're going to destroy your flesh, man. I was locked up during COVID, man. I was locked up during COVID, man. And when them PPs and all of that stuff was going on. All of that stuff was going on. Man, do you know what $2,000 can do in my community? Let alone $25 for free. For free. Yeah. Man. Man. Them PPs lasted 90 days. 90 days. yeah because they didn't do the right, they didn't do the right, you never saw yourself in that type of you never saw yourself in this you never saw yourself in this.

1:06:54 Somebody's in a dandy code somebody's in a dandy code so you so you set the tone and you said the subject for the night and you told the story on how why you came up with the subject for the night, because i get my brain all i've been i've been i found out this information early this week and when i was told, i started praying i started praying and i came over and i talked to my wife for God. He said, this is what my wife says. He said, listen, that I need to learn from you. And God is working on me. He's about to elevate me in some form or fashion or put me in some position.

1:07:37 Maybe not in the job, but put me in some position where I need to learn the lesson, the high school. I'm like, when you go through with this trust, this trust, Að ég fór að sjá. When you rise above, you still have to know how to speak to those beneath. Right. Or you'll grow into some type of tyrant, man. That I never want to be. Yeah, but when you the leader, you also got to listen to your followers, too. If you don't listen to your followers, who you need?

1:08:19 You can never grow a big head, man. Every leader ought to have someone that they follow. Even if that's just God. There's no one else. The day that we live in right now, leaders think, well, if I listen to somebody beneath me, that diminishes my authority. That's what people think now. If I can't listen to my supporters, that diminishes my authority. Yeah, that's what this Instagram is doing. That's what the likes and all of these hearts and comments and stuff is doing to them now. Because you love a million views. But then you hate a thousand comments.

1:09:00 On there and bash the people who are all in your comments with an opinion instead of taking it into consideration but that's badly society together that is just that is he the pity, like you said who consumes so another step up we, are continuously consuming so we have to consume and we're getting so big and talking about that i'm just saying we're doing so dude to right here, if you if you're doing something that's what i'm doing i'll keep speaking of just what i'm doing then what is it the chancellor now i gotta cancel you.

1:09:44 You're making better than you you're. Or i even got to bring you back down to my level Yeah, man, it's a well-oiled machine out here, man. And we are the minority, gentlemen. Oh, yes. Okay. We are the minority. That's why this place is so important, man. The kickback is very important, man. If some of the people are talking about these conversations we was talking about, you can be on that council, coach. Ha, ha, ha. All right, what did you just say earlier about views and comments?

1:10:24 Views and comments. Or likes and comments, whatever. Yeah, likes and comments are the new appraisal. But like they were saying, you don't want to listen to someone speaking up under you. So people are going to love when they get a million hearts on their posts. But those 50 comments that they got, they're not even going to consider them. And they're just going to go in there and read and then they're going to respond to the drama and the negativity instead of considering what people are saying in regard to what you just posted for public consumption. Right, right. But once again, people don't understand that you grow from criticism and you should be humbled by praise.

1:11:04 Anybody that puts praise over criticism, like 47, is easily played and easily manipulated. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Flattery right flattery right. That's one of those war tactics man i flatter you man i can't i can guide you into anything i want to man and that's what that's what no backbone bro yeah no backbone, that's what you ain't got no backbone man any situation or circumstance that's that seems favorable to you you may be willing to compromise everything that you're supposed to be standing for In today's world, most people.

1:11:48 Society is a well-oiled machine to where the majority of society wants to be, caught up to the next trend every time a trend comes about. Even if that is crop tops for men and spaghetti string white beaters, if somebody make it look good, now everybody's doing it. And I don't understand it. Hold on, hold on, hold on. Jamal, did you say crop tops for me? Yeah, man. They got crop tops out here for the guys now, man. No, sorry, though. No, sorry, though. Yes, they do, man. They cutting the bottom of the t-shirts, man. Them man and making them look like like they female shirts man but they making it to where it look a little masculine to where you can get don't you know who all in agreement that adornment and, and beautifying yourself is there's a difference between grooming, and and beautifying yourself yes there's a difference.

1:12:51 Tell that to a young fashionista out here nowadays. You can't tell him he ain't dripping in the sauce, man. He dripping so much sauce, it might get on your shoes or something. You can't tell him nothing. He don't want to hear it. His fee costs $3,500. He don't want to hear it. You can't afford it, this, that, et cetera. He gonna justify an excuse a crop top, man. This crop house costs $900, boy. You can't. You ain't even get paid that this week, bud. You're going to be like, oh, man, there ain't no point. See that? That's what we talked about earlier. That's the conversation that is not even necessary to have because you see where somebody's mind is at. Brother, look, there's only two spirits in the world, the spirit of truth and the spirit of error.

1:13:34 And there's a whole lot of error going on out here today. Yup. Yup. No sign. No sign. That criticism. That criticism. Don't nobody want to hear that. It's supposed to be a free world and everybody's pleasures and, desires are supposed to be respected and that's what man like it's it's just be crazy to me man because my eyes be wide open for real man and i just don't get some stuff man you know, like how can how can rights be asserted for a certain community of people when if you read religious texts, a whole nation or society was destroyed with the kids.

1:14:17 As it was in the days of Noah. Poof it. I heard this the other day, and there's no disrespect to nobody. Today's credit. What you want to hide from? And I'm just going to be looking the way I feel. You want to hide the same fucking movie you should have been in the day. Oh, yeah, for sure. For sure, man. And I had my own taste of that, bro. When I gave my brother a book, and about 90 days later, that nigga said he ain't read a page, man. Yeah, boy, I better not ever give you a book again. No. I'm going to send you an audio book or something next time if you get lucky. If you want to hide something, that's where you put it.

1:14:59 Had their book for 90 days and didn't read a page, y'all. No, that's too much worse. A book has the capabilities to literally change your whole trajectory, man. I can't tell you where I would be if I hadn't read some of the books I've read. Well, you wouldn't be where you're at, put it that way. Yeah, exactly. I would not be where I am today, man, had it not been for those books, man. That's how you elevate your mind, because if you don't elevate, you're going to stagnate. And then degenerate. Yup. But you can't tell these young folks that you understand that. You can't tell them that. It's just me. It's your community.

1:15:43 You muffle the kid, Joe. I said, you can't tell these young people out here that. If you tell them that, you're being negative. So let's come up with some unique solutions right now. How do you get the ear of a person that is reluctant to listen? You can. There's got to be a way. No, sir. You was here for the conversation where I said people going to stand on that hill and they're going to die on the hill. Once they stand on it, oh, they're going to die on that. You're not going to change their mind. No. No, sir, you're not. Oh, yeah, yeah. They're going to die on that one. All the niggas ran out of the plantation, bro, like, no, master said I got to stay right here. That's it.

1:16:28 That's it. I'm not going nowhere. Ain't no fences around it. Ain't no fence around here. Ain't nobody in sight. I ain't going to tell on y'all, but if he asks me, I got to tell the truth. That's it. That's a cold one there. Leave him. I ain't going to tell on y'all, but if he asks me where y'all went, I got to tell the truth. Why? What's wrong with y'all? Y'all went to the window tonight, man. laughing. Hey, you ain't got one fence. But yet, if you run, I can't run with you.

1:17:10 Hey, what is this man, man? Thanks so much. I ain't going to tell on you. But if they ask, I'm telling you. I got to tell him the truth, man. I'm a good boy. I'm a good boy. You're a rabbit, man. Y'all, y'all, man, you don't understand how, how, like, I've seen that in my life, you know. I've seen these people. I mean, you're not- They went that way. You were right. It was probably you, y'all. You said, I've always had a critical battle. Ring, ring. I've always had a critical battle. They're like, oh.

1:17:53 And I see these guys, they're just like, oh, I can go nowhere. Whatever they feed me i got three meals a day i got a roof over my head okay, i was about to eat this if you took any longer that's, what i know i know okay i know now they went they went that way they didn't even ask no question they just started pointing they went that way. Ain't asked one question you just looked at them they went that way about 10 minutes ago. If you leave now, you can catch...

1:18:42 Man, I was the opposite, man. If I was the one who did something and everybody was being quiet, thank you, have a good night. Everybody was being quiet to not be labeled a snitch. My heart wouldn't let everybody fall for something I done, man. Thank you. Couldn't do it. It's not a good feeling when you're watching people suffer because of something we did. Right. Okay. Well. And that's that accountability we be talking about. It is. That's the word you look at. That's that word right there. Accountability. Yes, sir. Could be that God's seed that's planted in you. Yes, sir. That seed from God makes you do right. Yes.

1:19:28 That's a part of every one of my prayers is that I ask him to forgive me the things I've done that was displeasing in his sight and to please send the spirit of conviction to show me me, so that I can be better and not displease you again in that same fashion yes I've did something the last couple of weeks that nobody ever thought I would do and I did it because nobody thought I was going to do, it I done actually took off the last two Fridays and two Mondays, what See? You see what? You shocked about it. You got to say that again.

1:20:08 You got to repeat that. I took off. I was off last Friday. I was off today. I was off last Monday. I'm going to be off this Monday. No, no, no. Hold up, bro. Hold up, bro. We need to find the people and bring the real Bubba back. Because you got to be a clone. Oh, they done got it, man. Not taking on Friday and Monday, two weeks in a row. Come on, man. Nobody saw it coming. They thought I was blowing smoke. Uh-uh, no, sir. I'm going to stand on this one right here. All right. Well, good. I'm proud of you. I am certainly proud of you, sir.

1:20:50 Because the company turned this back on me, so I feel, hey, I might as well go ahead and use the time that you paid me not to use. Oh, yeah. So what was the subject for tonight? I'm sorry, I came on late, fellas. Heavy is the head that wears the crown. He said that, he was like, what do you do when you being better is causing people to bash you, essentially? Yes. From his experience that he had at work, because... When you being better is causing the haters, you get all the haters, all the haters.

1:21:30 We're going to call it what it is. They hate us. Yeah. People start to hate you for being better, man. That's what I say, man. You know what? That's definitely my testimony. For my 30 years in the military, that was my testimony because people either hated there was no in-between. You was either on one end of the spectrum or the other. Either you loved me or you hated me because I stood on the UCMJ so tough. Between the UCMJ and the Word of God, That's what my two planks that I stood on. And if you violated either one of them, I was like the hatchet man. I didn't care. And that's what, hold on. This is what, this is what got me.

1:22:14 This is what got me these last couple of weeks at work is you made this policy. And if I enforce, I enforce your rules on you. I'm wrong. What they say. Do, do as I say, not do as I do. I'd have heard that a million times in my younger time. That's like page three out of the deal. Man, you better not be like, mama, I saw you, bro. Do as I say. Not as I do. In the mouth for talking too much. Okay. When you walked in the room of adults, you didn't say nothing other than hello.

1:22:56 That's all you did was speak and keep it moving. That's it. Keep it moving. You better not stop and have a seat. Ain't no dust settling on you. No. Not at all. Like you fit to get in the conversation or something. Like you sitting there to catch me up. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. And I was smart enough to realize when i eased in the room and they didn't chase me out i i felt respected just for allowing to be in the room just a little bit just a little bit, until you got until you got that until you got that line go get you some business go find you some business yeah because the conversation was getting ready to change yeah you you need to go find you some business go for go you see any kids in here.

1:23:44 But yeah it it stemmed from a situation and like like Bubba said the haters man and I feel like God has elevated me and put me in his place, for people to say that and you've heard it before Dave you think you better than me oh yeah all the time, you know I heard that but like I was saying you all light-skinned with curly hair you got that good you think you better than us right. But in my situation it had nothing to do with skin had to do something with drive determination and wanting better for myself yep, again that's integrity but that's doing too much i'm doing too much day i'm doing too much because your level of integrity shows their lack of integrity when people don't want to work as hard as you look Look, I'm the supervisor.

1:24:38 If I come in 30 minutes early and stay an hour late, that's because I'm doing what I have to do. I'm not trying to be better than you, but I'm doing what I have to do to lead this team to make sure that we stay on top of our game. Now, if I got a subordinate that's going to come in and match my time coming in, I want to appreciate that because I see that they're catching a spirit. You know, you just show signs of leadership. You're going to appreciate that. Motherfucking leadership where we at right now don't appreciate it at, all I'll go ahead and break the store down for you because there you don't know so I had a family emergency last month I had to come up off my bus I missed the last two hours last two hours the first time that I've missed work in three years, in three years I've never missed an hour.

1:25:30 Me, I was not, I was not getting my perfect attendance bonus. Man, you know what? That's your supervisor sucks because if they can't recognize how their bread is buttered, they stupid. They about, and that's how people, that's how people lose quality, uh, employees, quality workers. Because if I've got somebody that's coming in, busting their hump, doing what they have to do, and, and they have a family emergency come up, I'm like, nah, I'm take care of you you've been taking care of me by your by your labor coming in early or you know staying late or being on time you know having good customer service taking care of the children whatever whatever all of that is all on on the table, so if if they're not taking care of you like you said you got some sad supervisors that really don't know how to lead and don't know how to take care of people.

1:26:27 That's it that's it I ain't going to disagree with you at all because nothing you said was wrong I mean. See they don't miss their water until the well run dry see now if you and the other good employees found another job and moved on they'd be sitting there with their face broken like pastors say looking cheap in the face oh yeah, and that's what happens a lot of time. There's no loyalty to jobs today. Back in the 40s, 50s, 60s, you got a job with this company? Man, shoot. That's where they started getting that gold watch because people are going to stay there 25, 30 years and get that gold watch for retirement. Not anymore.

1:27:12 People jump from ship to ship. These days, I work here two years, go work somewhere else for three years, go back, get another job, work over here for another year and a half, or I'll go do DoorDash or whatever. There's too many options today. There's no loyalty. So when you have a good employee, you need to appreciate them. And you need to let them know that as a supervisor, you got their back. That very thing that you just said, because coming from where I came from and, being a supervisor, I said the very thing in the meeting. I said, so my loyalty and my dedication mean nothing. Exactly. Do you know they pulled out the policy on me and read me what the policy say.

1:27:59 I laugh. I proceeded to say, well, that policy ain't got no humane ain't nothing inhuman in that policy at all. We are human beings and things happen out of our control. And it's not like you couldn't figure out whether or not I was telling the truth because it happen in one of your buildings. That accountability thing comes up. Integrity and accountability comes up. Because if you're not the supervisor in charge and something goes down in that building, the person in charge of that building is going to be questioning, why did this go down in your building? Right. And if you don't have the answers, or if the problem, if the supervisor knew the problem existed and didn't take care of it, now that's going to point the finger of responsibility on that individual.

1:28:47 Because he didn't nip it in the bud, or she didn't nip it in the bud, She let it manifest. This is what I got in the conversation. This is what I got. This is what I got. I got, well, if we do it for you, then we, then somebody going to say, well, you did it here. You did it there. I say what, but then you wait, you weigh the situation and you wait, you weigh the person. Right. And is it the same exact circumstances? If the circumstances are the same. Are they the same exact circumstances? Does this person got much, as much loyalty and dedication as this person had? Have you been here like this person's been here right no exactly do you do you do you do you pick up and help out when when everybody around you need help.

1:29:35 You know it's better than all of that though when you don't put no trust in nobody because you got your trust in your most high first and foremost, there you go that's true freedom right there amen ain't it dave what i'm talking about i just told the guys earlier like i'm working on building my relationship with him because he's your best friend if you let him be, man. When you put your trust and your hopes and your dreams and your desires into the source, it reciprocates. It comes back tenfold every time, man. As long as you put in your hopes of somebody, and broken when they let you down. Yeah, no, no, no.

1:30:16 If you remain humble in yourself and you remain steadfast in your loyalty to your to your savior, you know he's going to lead you through whatever and like i said people are always going to talk they talked about jesus they crucified jesus so you can't you can't be in better company, that's how i took it i wore that as a badge of honor you talk about me 24 7 you put me down 24 7 the more you talk about me the more my father's going to elevate me. Me down. You can talk about me if you want to, but you got to realize I got a daddy in heaven that sees everything you say. And it's amazing how many times people that meant bad for me had to come back and apologize or became my footstool ended up having to be subordinated under me.

1:31:02 And they expected me to treat them bad, and I didn't. That's a word, right? That's a word. Every time you pull me, don't elevate me. Every time you pull me that and I didn't think about it like that. That's a word right there. Fellas. Grandma always said, if they're talking about you, if your name stays in somebody's mouth all the time, then you must be doing something right. Exactly. You live in rent-free in somebody's brain. Always. Fellas, we on the two-minute stretch. What y'all gotta say? Get up and out of here. I love living rent-free.

1:31:47 I want to thank all of my haters because you just motivated me to keep doing what I do. Exactly. While you tear me down, my Lord is lifting me up. Amen. And it don't get no better than that. No, sir. That was good. I love it. I love it. Y'all just took us out of here, man. Don't do this again. Love y'all, brothers. Y'all enjoy y'all weekend. All right, everybody, stay safe, stay hydrated. Stay safe, stay hydrated. Hey, Joe, give me a call when you get set. All right. All right. Later, fellas. Y'all be blessed. Later.