From Struggles to Strength: A Story of Resilience and Purpose

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Hello, everyone, and welcome to another episode of the Kickback.

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I am your host, The Dude, and as we do every Tuesday, we have amazing conversations

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with extraordinary people,

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and tonight is no less than an amazing conversation with a young lady who's

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doing some amazing things here in my city, Nashville,

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Tennessee, and we're just going to have a conversation as we do all the time.

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And if we can just have one conversation that could change the life of someone,

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I would hope that would happen.

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But before we get to all of that, let me say, if you have not been to our website,

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thekickback.com, please go check out our website.

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And also, the Kickback is sponsored by none other than Martin's Chicken and Waffles.

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Martin's Chicken and Waffles is an amazing place, and the food is phenomenal. my notes.

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So if you've never had Martin's Chicken and Waffles, I need you to go check them out.

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They are at 207 South Waters Avenue in Gallatin, Tennessee.

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Again, that is 207 South Waters Street in Gallatin, Tennessee.

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The food is amazing. Tell them you heard about them on the Kickback when you

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go visit them and let them know that the dude told you about it.

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Yeah, yeah, yeah.

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Music.

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I think it's what now you're trying to get some property so you can open up

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a home for women, right? Yes, sir.

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See? You're on the right track. You've been doing your homework. Yes, yes, yes.

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I saw you did an interview last year with Miss Stacy Pryor over at,

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I can't remember the name of her platform, but me and Stacy,

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we went to high school together.

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She's a really wonderful person. Okay. Yeah.

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So here's how the I just wanted to tell you that I've been watching your moves

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and I did a little of my research.

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But here's how the structure of my show goes, because I know you have your own platform.

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Yeah, I like to get all the business up front. Let's talk about what you've got going on.

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Let's talk about all your ventures, all your things you have going on.

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And then at the end, I'll ask a few questions, nothing malice, nothing hard.

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It's just a few few not really personal questions.

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They're just questions to try to get to know you outside of everything you have

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going on, because first and foremost, the reason why we brought you is because

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we want to advocate with you,

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with whatever you with all the ventures that you have going on.

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And we want to get the word out on our platform because

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we are a small startup and july

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the 17th will be one year we've been doing this and i really god has put this

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on my heart and it's been my purpose because in this platform has been a part

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of my healing i know that's right yeah so So when God puts you in your purpose, you also get healing.

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Yeah, that's right. So this was, this is, God says it's my purpose.

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And my wife also says, I just love to talk a lot anyways.

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So it gives me an opportunity to do both.

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It gives me an opportunity to serve God. And it also gives me an opportunity to be able to talk.

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Okay all righty so

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introduce yourself tell us about

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your ventures first tell us about your organization and then tell us about the

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ventures how you got to Nashville what brought you to Nashville and what God

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has put up on your heart to help the city of Nashville okay I got you So,

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my name is Centuria Franklin I am the founder and executive director for Pass to Beauty, Inc.

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Which is a non-profit that I found when I assumed overkind domestic violence in a past relationship,

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should I say The reason why I came to Nashville I actually came here due to

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the fact that I was looking for my own mother And I was separated from her for about almost four years,

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And so we found out that she was in Nashville.

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So we came down here and started to build a relationship back with my mother.

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And so, yeah, Lord brought us down here. When I say us, me and my siblings.

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And so did that, started and joined Nashville.

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I had to get used to Nashville because Nashville ran slow.

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Don't you do that with that. In Chicago, born and raised.

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Don't you do that. don't you do that I had to because baby Nashville was slow

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I think I moved back to Chicago two times until I can get adjusted with how

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slow it was but it was a good slow,

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so I got,

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in my years and realized, okay, this is what I needed.

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So that was great. So after that, I was inspired. But I have always been inspired to do my hairstyle.

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And this is kind of, and I'm giving this point because I need to do the organization well.

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I've always been inspired in Chicago going to box it down and do the salons

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and watch the OGs, do hair, do the finger raise, the feather ponytails, and things like that.

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And I was like, oh man, that's okay. If I want to get down like that,

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I don't want to brush some hair like that. So, yeah.

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So I became a hairstylist when I came to Nashville. And unfortunately,

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I got into some abusive relationships, which led me to start advocating.

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And I used that as a healing agent. I'm going to be honest with you,

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because when I got into this advocacy work, I had absolutely no idea what I was doing.

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And I'm just going to be very vague and tell you that I had no clue in what I was doing.

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I just knew that I had to do something because my mental health was at jeopardy, you know.

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And so I definitely did that. And it gave me more purpose than I ever thought it would.

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So I'm learning. Even to today, I'm still learning. I'm still learning.

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That is amazing that God brought you down here to have a reuniting with your

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mom, and then it turned into what it's turned into your program.

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Like I said, I've done your homework.

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You've had the boutique.

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You had—are you still doing food?

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No, I'm not.

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I don't know if you're moving around or what. They turn like a robot on my end.

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I have to say one or four times. Oh, yeah.

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I'm not moving around. I'm actually still in battle. Can you hear me?

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Yeah, I can hear you a little better now. I don't know what's going on.

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Yes, I can hear you, but I don't know what happened with what's going on with

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your connection because you were complaining to me. You sounded like a robot.

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Okay. So let me know. I can repeat if you want to repeat the question.

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It was the question about the food. Are you still doing the food?

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I think you said you were just focusing on the advocacy part of it, right? Yes.

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Yes, that's correct. I'm just doing the nonprofit work and I do have part time. Okay.

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That's wonderful. So let's dive deep into what you say you what brought you

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to the point of starting this nonprofit.

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You got into an abusive relationship being that you're on the other side because

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you said when you first started, you didn't know the process and what all went into it.

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But let's start with what got you to that point. You say you were in an abusive relationship.

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How did you, was it the fact that, was it low self-esteem or what was it?

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And if I'm going too far, you tell me, but how did you get into these abusive relationships?

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Okay, so let me answer that question Alright, so when you're growing up As a young lady, right?

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And you're growing up in an environment That you've been taught And when you're

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age Let me, okay, I have the best way to describe this.

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When you're growing up as a Chicagoan Everything in your power,

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in your body In your mindset has to be put on your tough pants.

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You know what I'm saying? That's the best way I've described.

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And so, all I've seen was behavior where it was yelling, arguments,

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and things as such, you know?

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And when you're not taught how to love yourself, that's kind of the behavior

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that you pick up, you know what I mean? And so...

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In that moment, when I was going through abusive, you know, when I was in abusive

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relationships, there was a moment, and I could tell you this,

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I was actually doing hair.

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And I had just got out of that relationship. And I said, you know what?

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I just need to break this cycle.

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I asked God to show me what is it that I need to do to feel good about who I am.

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Because I wasn't taught that. I wasn't taught how to love myself.

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You know, I come from a mother that dealt with mental health.

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So she wasn't able to teach me the things that I need to know about who Centuria was.

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So I had to learn that on my own, the best way I knew how.

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And so with that being said, I didn't know how to do that.

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So I had to choose the best option of getting in areas in my life and environments

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in my life that would feed me, that would feed me in a way,

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mentally, spiritually, and emotionally to recognize who I was and the toxic

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behavior that I was accepting.

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Basically, I was tired.

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And when you get tired, you start wanting to do stuff that's going to bring

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joy into your life, that's going to bring peace in your life,

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especially when you have never experienced peace.

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So those things, initiatives, are going to make you want to do better and make

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you want to start doing healthy things.

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And one of the healthy things I had to do was get out of an unhealthy relationship.

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Yes, and I totally agree and I understand. And what you just explained,

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a lot of people don't understand.

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But here, I'm going to preference this and then I'm going to tell you a story.

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Here, when I said at the beginning that this has been therapy for me,

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I totally understand what you're saying.

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I grew up in a household where there was love, but it was domestic violence.

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And let me explain to you, because most people think of domestic violence like

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you were in an abusive relationship. Now, I'm a man and I grew up in a household

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where my mother was the abuser.

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She was the abuser in the household I grew up in. But let me give you a bit

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of a reference in the background on the reason why.

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And it was probably five to six years ago when I really,

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truly found out why my mother was the way she was and the particular moment

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in her life that made her the way she was. Okay.

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So I'm in my, I'm in my late forties and throughout my life,

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I watched my mother beat up every boyfriend she's ever had in my life until

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she got with the man she's with now.

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She's married to, she's been with for 20 years because she had gotten tired.

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But my mother, about, like I said, five to six years ago, I sat down with my

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mother and I don't know if it was God or who it was, but we were sitting on

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my couch at my house and we were having a conversation about something.

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And I just said, Mom, what has happened?

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Why are you always the aggressor? And she had to sit there and she had to think

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for a moment and she thought for a moment.

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And then this look came over her face and tears just rolled down her eyes.

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Tears just rolled down her eyes. And she says,

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Horace, I'm just going to say that. The gentleman's name was Horace.

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And what happened was the night before she graduated, this gentleman by the

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name of Horace was her boyfriend.

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And she said something happened between the two of them. And he beat her.

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I mean, beat her from one side of the room to the other side of the room,

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from one side of the room to the other side of the room, from one side of the room.

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And she said the next morning she got up with a black eye, put on makeup and

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went and graduated from high school.

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And at that moment, she said she never, never let a man put their hands on her.

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So I put two and two together. In

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life, when we have pivotal moments like graduations, children being born,

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you know, any type of celebration to have a traumatic experience mixed with

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those things is something that we carry with us forever.

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Now, this was when I was in my 40s and my mother had to see it brought up and

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she cried on my she cried in my arms after that.

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And I mean, we booed and cried after that, after she she that memory came back

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to her of him beating her.

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And then she had to go graduate the next day. So a traumatic experience and

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experience that you remember forever were put together.

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Because I always wondered why did

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my mother all why was she always the aggressor

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why was she always them beating men I'd

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never when I say Centauri my mama is

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she is the champ she got the belt she's never took

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a she's never took a TKO in my life whether it be man woman whoever she's never

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taken a TKO in my life and I'm not saying that to brag I'm saying this in context

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to what you're saying and that I understand growing up in a dysfunctional household.

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She did so she we cried and boohooed and she told me that story and i understood

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because like my wife now i tell my wife and i told her when we first got together

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and i told this to every woman i've ever been with i said if we've got to get mad enough at each other.

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Mad physically mad when we have to assault each other i cannot be here that's

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right that's right I can't be in a relationship with you.

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If you're mad enough that you get so mad that you have to assault me and I have

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to assault you, we don't need to be together.

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That's right. We do not need to be together. I refuse to be in a relationship

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with someone that I have to be so angry that I have to strike. Yeah.

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You know, it's so crazy.

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One of the things that I had to teach myself over the years was how to celebrate myself.

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And the reason why, because, you know,

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in this situation, unfortunately, circumstances that I've experienced over the

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time, because the time has been a young girl to an adult, I never had my parents at a graduation.

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No matter if I graduated from 8th grade, high school, college,

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I never experienced my parents being available or there for me at the graduation.

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Even my siblings may have, I'm sure they experienced the same thing.

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But one of the things that came from that, the trauma that came from that is,

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I don't want to celebrate myself because...

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The fact that I don't have anybody to celebrate with.

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And it took me a long time to, I don't care about, you know, doing an event.

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I was never like the best me at events or anything in the past because I didn't

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know how to value what I've done, whatever the achievement that may have been.

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And I have to learn how to forgive myself because I understand that it was not

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my fault that that happened.

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You know what I'm saying? because I blamed me.

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And forgiveness goes a long way. And it will heal you in so many ways to not carry trauma with you.

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And it took me a long time to get to that point when you experience so much

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in your life. You know what I mean?

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So here's the thing. When dealing with domestic violence or when dealing with

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verbal abuse, the verbal abuse

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lasts longer than domestic violence because it channels your mindset.

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It affects your mindset in a way that tries to control you.

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You almost put yourself in a position that you should become codependent on

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what others think of you or how you move.

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And sometimes depression sinks in. So you have to take back what belongs to you and celebrate you.

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And I often say that because I'm an individual that critically thinks about

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a lot of things and how to find a resolution and how to resolve conflict because

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I've been through a lot of conflict and so a lot of times I'm thinking to myself.

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But the point of the matter is when you develop into a new mindset,

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a new you, you got to find ways to observe of.

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Any challenges that may distract you from being the best version of you,

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no matter even if you see signs in an unhealthy relationship or a man or it could be a man or a woman.

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And yes, and I always say women abuse too, because I was angry when I was going

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through some things in my life. And here's the thing.

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I was going through some challenges before I even entered into a relationship. You know what I mean?

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Yes. I was struggling with my own mental health. So, one of the things that

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I realized, I had to learn how to take accountability for my actions.

00:19:59.369 --> 00:20:04.329
Because, baby, let me tell you something. You cannot stop me from snapping off on somebody.

00:20:04.669 --> 00:20:08.089
I would snap off real quick, and that's a trauma-informed reaction.

00:20:08.169 --> 00:20:09.489
You know what I mean? Reaction.

00:20:10.649 --> 00:20:14.329
As soon as somebody would say something to me, I would immediately snap.

00:20:15.109 --> 00:20:18.029
And so because i've been through so much in

00:20:18.029 --> 00:20:20.909
my life i could recognize a lot of

00:20:20.909 --> 00:20:23.629
things from men and women you know

00:20:23.629 --> 00:20:28.369
i mean yeah they've been through some stuff so i always be putting on my big

00:20:28.369 --> 00:20:32.009
girl panties and i'm like hey let me let me holler at you for a sec you know

00:20:32.009 --> 00:20:39.149
i mean because i'm very assertive in my and what i say and he the couple calling

00:20:39.149 --> 00:20:41.009
him you know i mean but I say it in a way.

00:20:41.469 --> 00:20:46.469
You know what I mean? Like, I try to say it in a way that because if I love

00:20:46.469 --> 00:20:51.569
somebody and I see them doing it, I say, man, who else is going to be brave enough to tell them?

00:20:51.709 --> 00:20:58.989
If nobody else will say anything, how can they help them develop to be in the

00:20:58.989 --> 00:21:02.249
best version of themselves?

00:21:03.009 --> 00:21:07.029
Only selfish people do that. You know what I'm saying? Now, I know a lot of

00:21:07.029 --> 00:21:11.389
times, a lot of people don't invite, You know are not inviting me,

00:21:12.032 --> 00:21:14.892
You know, a lot of people are scared to approach people, but if I love you,

00:21:14.992 --> 00:21:21.152
and if I see my brothers and sisters doing something, and if they see me doing

00:21:21.152 --> 00:21:24.692
something, always, like I tell my friend, check me. Exactly.

00:21:25.632 --> 00:21:29.332
If you love me, check me. Yeah. You know what I'm saying?

00:21:30.872 --> 00:21:35.812
I have a bubbly personality. I'm always cracking jokes. I'm always laughing,

00:21:35.852 --> 00:21:38.412
but I wasn't at that place all the time in my life.

00:21:38.612 --> 00:21:41.132
You couldn't get a word out of me back in 2010.

00:21:41.752 --> 00:21:48.492
I never talked because I felt like what I had to say didn't matter or I wasn't

00:21:48.492 --> 00:21:51.852
smart enough to say it because I had a speech and language barrier.

00:21:52.992 --> 00:21:57.352
And a part of that disability, I was afraid to say anything because I didn't know big words.

00:21:58.352 --> 00:22:02.492
I just felt like I was just the person. I didn't fit in.

00:22:02.812 --> 00:22:08.532
Or I was scared with my stuttering that, oh, they probably just tried to chastise

00:22:08.532 --> 00:22:12.332
me because I can't get it out. Now, I take my time to process it,

00:22:12.392 --> 00:22:16.132
but I also say, give me time to say what I need to say. Don't rush me.

00:22:16.512 --> 00:22:17.072
You know what I'm saying?

00:22:18.072 --> 00:22:23.492
So those are the things that I built, the confidence I built over the years

00:22:23.492 --> 00:22:26.532
because of everything that I experienced in my life.

00:22:27.012 --> 00:22:29.972
You understand what I'm saying? I had a gun put to my head before.

00:22:30.512 --> 00:22:35.152
I've been in it and definitely other places.

00:22:36.292 --> 00:22:39.612
Now, I could have been gone. I just don't. There's a lot of stuff I don't talk

00:22:39.612 --> 00:22:42.312
about. Chicago. That's the Chicago.

00:22:42.932 --> 00:22:46.632
You know what I mean? Like those things, you know, I've been set up,

00:22:46.872 --> 00:22:48.852
you know, I've been through a lot.

00:22:49.032 --> 00:22:52.452
And I guess that's why I just like, I'm brave.

00:22:53.032 --> 00:22:56.012
That's why Nashville was the perfect fit for you.

00:22:57.852 --> 00:23:02.812
Yeah. God had to bring you out of that mess in order for you to blossom into

00:23:02.812 --> 00:23:04.872
the beautiful flower that you are today.

00:23:05.749 --> 00:23:10.129
And that's crazy because I thank you for saying that because I don't think I

00:23:10.129 --> 00:23:11.929
probably would have survived in Chicago.

00:23:13.269 --> 00:23:17.089
I'm going to be honest with you. Years ago, we went to visit near my siblings.

00:23:17.829 --> 00:23:21.369
And they literally shot the back window out. The bullet missed my head.

00:23:21.889 --> 00:23:26.789
You understand what I'm saying? Yes. When that happened, I knew God had favor on me.

00:23:27.369 --> 00:23:31.609
Like, I knew that since I was a little girl because the only person I really talked to was God.

00:23:31.909 --> 00:23:35.489
I wrote to God all the time. I said, how am I drawing? because I felt like that

00:23:35.489 --> 00:23:38.669
was the only person I had that would listen that didn't judge me.

00:23:39.089 --> 00:23:42.349
You understand what I'm saying? That was the spiritual connection that I had with God.

00:23:42.649 --> 00:23:46.109
Oh, I totally understand. Tell people, they connected.

00:23:46.369 --> 00:23:51.009
They spiritually connected to God when you don't have nobody because you got him.

00:23:51.229 --> 00:23:55.049
You understand what I'm saying? Yes, I totally get it and understand what you're

00:23:55.049 --> 00:23:59.589
saying, but it's powerful to hear your testimony on everything that you've been

00:23:59.589 --> 00:24:03.109
through and the life that you've been through. Just having the conversation with you right now.

00:24:03.269 --> 00:24:08.429
Yes, I can tell you have a little speech impediment, but I didn't know you stuttered

00:24:08.429 --> 00:24:14.049
because you're articulating and we're having a really amazing conversation,

00:24:14.049 --> 00:24:19.789
and you're telling me your story, and I understand everything that you're saying

00:24:19.789 --> 00:24:20.869
and you've been through.

00:24:21.109 --> 00:24:25.229
So it's amazing what God can bring us through when we move ourselves out of

00:24:25.229 --> 00:24:30.369
the way and let him take the wheel and start blessing us.

00:24:30.509 --> 00:24:35.629
Yes, like I said, he had to move you out of your mess and out of your own way

00:24:35.629 --> 00:24:38.669
to develop you into the beautiful flower you are today.

00:24:38.929 --> 00:24:44.289
As I said earlier, and I'm going to say this, and it's a joke,

00:24:44.469 --> 00:24:48.569
but I kind of been stalking your social media and things like that just to get

00:24:48.569 --> 00:24:50.849
a feel of who I was interviewing today.

00:24:51.885 --> 00:24:54.965
And things that you've been it ain't like it's not

00:24:54.965 --> 00:24:57.745
like it was just to get research on who you

00:24:57.745 --> 00:25:01.985
were no you good because i always tell one of my board members of my friend

00:25:01.985 --> 00:25:08.585
i said people are always watching me and it's not a bad thing but i know that

00:25:08.585 --> 00:25:12.185
when you are favored by god when you doing god's work that's what they gonna

00:25:12.185 --> 00:25:15.125
do your research you're gonna do your research yes yes,

00:25:15.585 --> 00:25:19.425
yes always yeah but it's

00:25:19.425 --> 00:25:23.005
it's to hear you talk about your upbringing

00:25:23.005 --> 00:25:27.105
and where you come from and to see your social media and to see the things that

00:25:27.105 --> 00:25:32.385
you've done and that you are doing in this life because you're on the other

00:25:32.385 --> 00:25:37.445
side of life now we on the other side of 40 so we do it we we you know i'm saying

00:25:37.445 --> 00:25:42.645
we we got more time behind us than we have in front of us you You understand what I'm saying?

00:25:43.265 --> 00:25:48.205
Yeah. So in this, and I call 40 your second life, your second win,

00:25:48.385 --> 00:25:50.125
your second race, your second life.

00:25:50.385 --> 00:25:56.765
So all the things you've done in your second life is so amazing compared to

00:25:56.765 --> 00:25:59.165
what you just told me about, you know,

00:25:59.585 --> 00:26:03.245
trying to reconnect with your mom, moving to a whole different state,

00:26:03.465 --> 00:26:09.665
starting over, being in a domestic situation that brought you to the point you

00:26:09.665 --> 00:26:11.425
are now having low self-esteem.

00:26:11.845 --> 00:26:16.645
Because you had a speech impediment and you had this and you thought people would count you out.

00:26:16.745 --> 00:26:20.465
Maybe they did count you out, but God had you in the number the whole time.

00:26:20.936 --> 00:26:25.436
He had you in a number the whole time. But this world that we live in is so

00:26:25.436 --> 00:26:27.296
wicked. Yes, they count everybody out.

00:26:27.636 --> 00:26:33.156
Listen, I'm a loner. I do a lot of things by myself because I don't meet the

00:26:33.156 --> 00:26:39.196
criteria of most people in this world because I don't want to be seen out in the streets.

00:26:39.216 --> 00:26:44.476
I don't want to be seen here and there. I want this platform that I'm on right

00:26:44.476 --> 00:26:48.536
now to help somebody realize that what you're going through today ain't going

00:26:48.536 --> 00:26:52.076
to be your tomorrow, ain't going to be your next week, ain't going to be your next year.

00:26:52.076 --> 00:26:58.536
But there are so many young people out here in the world living in a domestic situation,

00:26:58.756 --> 00:27:04.716
a drug situation, a homeless situation, or a combination of the all three or

00:27:04.716 --> 00:27:08.136
abusive parents or whoever it may be.

00:27:08.376 --> 00:27:12.716
And they think that where they are right now is going to be there forever.

00:27:12.956 --> 00:27:17.336
And just like you, at one point, you probably thought, oh, man,

00:27:17.416 --> 00:27:18.676
they're going to keep on counting me out.

00:27:18.796 --> 00:27:21.316
Nobody's ever going to recognize me. Nobody's ever going to see me.

00:27:21.316 --> 00:27:22.736
But I done seen you on the red carpet.

00:27:22.956 --> 00:27:27.516
I done seen you at some events dressed up in them pretty dresses with all them colors.

00:27:27.756 --> 00:27:34.216
I done seen what God has done in your life. So we are here today to have a conversation

00:27:34.216 --> 00:27:38.636
and I hope somebody hears this and understands that if he can do it for Ms.

00:27:38.716 --> 00:27:40.156
Franklin, if he can do it for Mr.

00:27:40.296 --> 00:27:45.516
Foster, because my last name is Foster, but if he can do it for us, he can do it for you.

00:27:45.976 --> 00:27:48.516
Yes, Lord, yeah. He sure can.

00:27:49.356 --> 00:27:55.636
I'm married to my wife. of we've been married a little four years.

00:27:55.636 --> 00:27:58.036
I was married before to another woman for 10 years.

00:27:58.156 --> 00:28:01.176
It just didn't work out. Life sometimes doesn't work out.

00:28:01.950 --> 00:28:05.870
But how I met this woman was not my intent on meeting this woman.

00:28:06.230 --> 00:28:09.490
And our testimony is I wasn't her.

00:28:09.870 --> 00:28:15.450
I wasn't what she liked and she wasn't what I liked. But here's the thing that got us.

00:28:15.810 --> 00:28:19.490
God put us together because we were what each other needed.

00:28:20.150 --> 00:28:24.410
Hmm, that's good. You understand what I'm saying? We was what each other needed.

00:28:24.810 --> 00:28:28.150
Now, I've been with this woman for five years.

00:28:28.370 --> 00:28:32.130
This is going to sound crazy. And when I tell people, they kind of think about

00:28:32.130 --> 00:28:34.050
it. But this is how good God is.

00:28:34.270 --> 00:28:38.410
I just told you, I'm in my late 40s. My wife is in her late 40s.

00:28:38.890 --> 00:28:43.010
The five years that I've been with my wife, I've done more with her.

00:28:43.230 --> 00:28:45.730
Well, let me rephrase that. Let me fix this.

00:28:46.110 --> 00:28:51.890
I've done more with God and my wife than I've done in my whole entire life.

00:28:54.170 --> 00:28:57.370
Because before I was running for God, you know, God, like you said,

00:28:57.490 --> 00:29:00.670
you knew you was anointed a long time ago. I knew I was anointed a long time

00:29:00.670 --> 00:29:04.370
ago, but we ran from it because we wanted to be with the crowd.

00:29:04.550 --> 00:29:08.690
We wanted to be out in the streets. We wasn't ready for what God had for us.

00:29:08.990 --> 00:29:12.450
We wanted to continue to live the life that we wanted to live.

00:29:13.070 --> 00:29:16.890
So when God came to me one day and he said, it's time. And I was like,

00:29:17.010 --> 00:29:20.650
time? What you talking about, God? He was like, it's time.

00:29:21.250 --> 00:29:24.150
And I kept praying. I kept praying. It's time for what, God?

00:29:24.610 --> 00:29:28.390
And then one day he gave me another word and it was surrender.

00:29:29.150 --> 00:29:35.290
And I'm like, what is he talking about? God, you gave me its time five, six months ago.

00:29:35.850 --> 00:29:39.650
And then today you give me surrender. What are you trying to say to me, Lord?

00:29:40.250 --> 00:29:43.010
What are you trying to say to me? And I said, oh, and I had to sit there and

00:29:43.010 --> 00:29:48.030
I had to. I prayed and I thought about it and I said, time to surrender.

00:29:49.311 --> 00:29:53.391
Time to surrender, time to surrender to him because I had been out here running

00:29:53.391 --> 00:29:56.011
these streets and I wasn't living in my purpose.

00:29:56.271 --> 00:30:01.751
And my marriage before was a marriage because I'd been in so many bad relationships,

00:30:02.031 --> 00:30:04.791
none of them domestic, but bad relationships.

00:30:04.871 --> 00:30:09.591
Because I, being growing up in the household that I grew up in,

00:30:09.911 --> 00:30:11.631
there was a few things my mother missed.

00:30:11.751 --> 00:30:15.611
It wasn't intentional, but there was a few things my mother missed.

00:30:15.611 --> 00:30:20.831
And I always got with women that I felt like I had to save and talking to you,

00:30:20.991 --> 00:30:25.911
you just gave me an epiphany and I'm going to go ahead and tell my wife God just gave me a word.

00:30:26.911 --> 00:30:31.631
I thought that I was in these relationships but it was it was two parts to what

00:30:31.631 --> 00:30:36.651
God just gave me something thank you Lord you Miss Franklin,

00:30:36.711 --> 00:30:42.091
you just gave me and you talking just gave me an answer I've been looking for for a long time,

00:30:42.751 --> 00:30:44.771
and it's making me emotional,

00:30:45.491 --> 00:30:49.051
it really is it's making me emotional so i'm

00:30:49.051 --> 00:30:51.831
sorry are you saying you

00:30:51.831 --> 00:30:58.351
got nothing to be sorry about i was trying

00:30:58.351 --> 00:31:05.231
to save my mama you know i understand i understand today is my mom's birthday

00:31:05.231 --> 00:31:14.591
oh my grandmother's birthday and so yeah until i just told you this story and you talked to me,

00:31:15.551 --> 00:31:18.511
see how God works in mysterious ways I

00:31:18.511 --> 00:31:21.351
never looked at it that way until I just told you this

00:31:21.351 --> 00:31:28.011
story and listened to you talk about your life and God just spoke to me because

00:31:28.011 --> 00:31:33.651
I always thought it was I used to think it was me trying to save me because

00:31:33.651 --> 00:31:41.251
I was looking for validation as a man and that's why I chose the subpar women that I chose.

00:31:42.218 --> 00:31:45.458
But in actuality they were

00:31:45.458 --> 00:31:49.718
all figures figures of my mom oh

00:31:49.718 --> 00:31:53.698
wow that's good

00:31:53.698 --> 00:31:56.838
and i was trying to rescue her

00:31:56.838 --> 00:31:59.818
from the pain that she had been going through

00:31:59.818 --> 00:32:02.758
and i was a kid and i really didn't know that

00:32:02.758 --> 00:32:05.738
but you know once i got older

00:32:05.738 --> 00:32:08.838
i picked certain women in my life

00:32:08.838 --> 00:32:12.458
that were not we

00:32:12.458 --> 00:32:16.458
were not equally yoked let's just say that yeah yeah

00:32:16.458 --> 00:32:20.718
we were not equally yoked and i i i i've

00:32:20.718 --> 00:32:24.578
had conversations with my wife and and i've

00:32:24.578 --> 00:32:27.478
had conversations on here and i've had all things but

00:32:27.478 --> 00:32:30.238
i guess it was just hard for me to talk to you and

00:32:30.238 --> 00:32:37.378
you gave it to me wow wow that's how god work i'm telling you that the right

00:32:37.378 --> 00:32:43.118
place at the right time right right right and maybe that's the reason why he

00:32:43.118 --> 00:32:47.478
didn't want us to have a conversation the first time because you had.

00:32:48.738 --> 00:32:53.158
You had a word you were supposed to deliver to me. Yeah.

00:32:53.678 --> 00:32:55.358
Wow. Man.

00:32:56.298 --> 00:33:04.978
Yeah. Yeah. But listen, you, uh, your organization, when did you start your organization?

00:33:05.930 --> 00:33:10.330
So I started the organization in March of 2012.

00:33:11.370 --> 00:33:16.010
Okay. Okay. So you've been going for a long time.

00:33:17.330 --> 00:33:22.630
So how many... And I was actually volunteering before. Yeah.

00:33:23.170 --> 00:33:29.690
How many women have been through your organization since 2012?

00:33:30.830 --> 00:33:31.190
Woo!

00:33:32.430 --> 00:33:36.950
More than 300. We started through... And that's through programming,

00:33:37.190 --> 00:33:38.550
that's through outreach events,

00:33:38.990 --> 00:33:45.350
that's through support groups, that's through me partnering with other organizations,

00:33:45.350 --> 00:33:50.010
that's me working and volunteering at a local domestic violence shelter,

00:33:50.210 --> 00:33:51.750
that's through the hair salon,

00:33:52.230 --> 00:33:54.890
that's through many programs, yeah.

00:33:55.410 --> 00:34:00.030
Are those, are any of those women, do you still see any of those women on a

00:34:00.030 --> 00:34:01.550
daily, weekly, or anything?

00:34:02.230 --> 00:34:05.030
I see i see someone from time to time i take

00:34:05.030 --> 00:34:07.930
crisis calls but actually they always reach out

00:34:07.930 --> 00:34:10.710
someone reach out to me often to check

00:34:10.710 --> 00:34:16.810
on me because i like this way so yeah i do communicate they see me on social

00:34:16.810 --> 00:34:23.370
media yeah okay i mean and that's wonderful because you know i know we don't

00:34:23.370 --> 00:34:27.530
do it for the glory i know we don't do it for the for the reachbacks or any

00:34:27.530 --> 00:34:29.210
of those things but you No, it's just,

00:34:29.470 --> 00:34:35.190
I thought it's always good to see people or check on people that have crossed

00:34:35.190 --> 00:34:40.430
your path because there was a reason they crossed your path in the first place.

00:34:41.370 --> 00:34:49.150
Yeah. Yeah. Oh, yeah. So you say you take crisis calls. Are you still doing hair full time?

00:34:50.030 --> 00:34:52.310
No, I do have part time. Okay.

00:34:53.230 --> 00:34:56.650
And where's, do you own your shop or are you working out of someone's shop?

00:34:57.513 --> 00:35:02.493
Yeah, I'm working out of somebody's shop. So right now, I'm, yeah, I'm still.

00:35:05.113 --> 00:35:05.713
Because.

00:35:08.133 --> 00:35:11.433
I love how I find it.

00:35:13.333 --> 00:35:18.833
I've been years of that on since I'm doing my editor. I'm still freelance now

00:35:18.833 --> 00:35:20.233
back and doing photo shoots.

00:35:21.133 --> 00:35:26.353
You went robot on me. You go for that.

00:35:27.073 --> 00:35:30.753
You go for that. Can you hear me now? Yeah, I can hear you now,

00:35:30.913 --> 00:35:33.973
but you were saying something about photo shoots or something,

00:35:34.113 --> 00:35:35.333
and it kind of went real well.

00:35:35.693 --> 00:35:39.913
Yeah, I'm steering towards back into freelancing doing photo shoots.

00:35:40.413 --> 00:35:45.293
I'll be styling, yeah, on set, yeah. Okay. That's cool.

00:35:46.833 --> 00:35:50.653
Have you met any famous people doing that? Oh, yeah.

00:35:51.333 --> 00:35:54.353
Yeah. I have famous friends. Okay.

00:35:54.693 --> 00:35:59.673
Hey, it's wonderful. I look at them like they're just me, though. You know what I mean?

00:36:00.413 --> 00:36:04.033
And that's it. I tell everybody. I'll be honest with you. You know what I'm saying?

00:36:04.533 --> 00:36:08.013
Because we're truly, I'll say this a lot. We're truly got me that,

00:36:08.113 --> 00:36:11.373
my money. Who was twerking behind the chair through the post?

00:36:12.113 --> 00:36:17.493
Okay. Yeah. Yeah. But, yeah, I do have some celebrity friends.

00:36:18.253 --> 00:36:23.813
Okay. I mean, that's wonderful. It's cool because God has put you in a place

00:36:23.813 --> 00:36:26.833
where he needed you to be now. So the blessings are abundant.

00:36:27.413 --> 00:36:31.753
Oh, I appreciate it. Yes. You too as well. You too as well.

00:36:32.353 --> 00:36:37.753
I absolutely love this platform. I think it's awesome. I think you have a strong voice.

00:36:38.554 --> 00:36:43.294
I love to see men thrive. You know, just the other day I was asking,

00:36:43.474 --> 00:36:46.054
you know, hey, man, you know, how's your mental health?

00:36:46.234 --> 00:36:48.874
But how are you doing, basically? That's what my question was.

00:36:49.374 --> 00:36:55.234
A lot of times we forget about men and men do matter. So I just love the fact

00:36:55.234 --> 00:36:56.574
that you have this platform.

00:36:56.974 --> 00:37:02.554
Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. I appreciate it. And what I do this on Tuesdays,

00:37:02.634 --> 00:37:04.134
I do these interviews on Tuesdays.

00:37:04.134 --> 00:37:09.614
And on Fridays, I do a two hour live show where I have men come on and we just

00:37:09.614 --> 00:37:13.074
talk about whatever's on their mind, whatever they're feeling, because you're right.

00:37:13.294 --> 00:37:17.854
And that's the other reason why I started this platform is because God came

00:37:17.854 --> 00:37:21.614
to me and he said men needed a place where they could have real,

00:37:21.794 --> 00:37:24.694
true, vulnerable and transparent conversations.

00:37:24.694 --> 00:37:27.674
Conversations just like I busted out in tears because

00:37:27.674 --> 00:37:31.094
God gave me this word I I've

00:37:31.094 --> 00:37:35.754
had a lot of vulnerable and transparent conversations on this platform in front

00:37:35.754 --> 00:37:40.094
front in front of other men now of course we can't see each other because it's

00:37:40.094 --> 00:37:46.054
audio but still and I've had I've had a man come on and talk about being s8

00:37:46.054 --> 00:37:50.854
I've had a gentleman come on talking about he was in a domestic situation.

00:37:51.054 --> 00:37:55.634
God told him that he had to go file charges on this woman that beat him.

00:37:55.794 --> 00:37:59.934
But there's not a lot of platforms out here talking about these things.

00:38:00.174 --> 00:38:04.374
There's not a lot of places that men can go and have real conversations about

00:38:04.374 --> 00:38:06.114
what's really going on with them.

00:38:06.414 --> 00:38:10.254
A lot of these podcasts are about what's going on in the world right now,

00:38:10.474 --> 00:38:13.834
sports and fluff and things that really don't matter.

00:38:14.054 --> 00:38:17.474
And no one's having the true, genuine conversations. Hey,

00:38:17.474 --> 00:38:20.834
brother like you said how's your mental health are you

00:38:20.834 --> 00:38:24.354
yeah yeah which is very important yeah

00:38:24.354 --> 00:38:27.354
yes but there's there's in this

00:38:27.354 --> 00:38:30.714
society there's no real true space

00:38:30.714 --> 00:38:33.714
for it and i'm trying to build a

00:38:33.714 --> 00:38:36.834
space here with god and with

00:38:36.834 --> 00:38:39.754
the people that he's put in my in my

00:38:39.754 --> 00:38:42.994
atmosphere to build this platform to

00:38:42.994 --> 00:38:45.954
be that space like i said july the 17th will

00:38:45.954 --> 00:38:48.574
be one year we're trying to figure out what we're going

00:38:48.574 --> 00:38:53.154
to do we don't really have a budget i've been paying for it all out my pocket

00:38:53.154 --> 00:38:59.274
but it is what it is by the grace of god it'll eventually come it'll it will

00:38:59.274 --> 00:39:06.234
eventually come and people will eventually hear us and hear our message and see who we are.

00:39:07.812 --> 00:39:12.372
I'm not in it for the cloud. I'm not getting paid. I'm not in it for anything.

00:39:12.552 --> 00:39:18.612
I'm in it for my healing and for my purpose to serve God.

00:39:19.332 --> 00:39:21.172
Right. I love that.

00:39:22.012 --> 00:39:27.052
And that's what alignment is. The alignment is there and the rest will come.

00:39:27.252 --> 00:39:29.912
Because I did this work for almost 11 years.

00:39:30.232 --> 00:39:35.472
And so it took me that many years. But as I look back, it don't seem like that

00:39:35.472 --> 00:39:40.712
in all these many years. But, you know, when you're doing the work, it's that good.

00:39:40.992 --> 00:39:44.372
You know what I mean? Despite the conflict, despite the ups and downs,

00:39:44.852 --> 00:39:47.692
it really be that good when you can see the outcome.

00:39:48.132 --> 00:39:53.612
Right, right. When I had, I've had some gentlemen come on my Friday live show

00:39:53.612 --> 00:39:58.432
and they're like, man, I would never normally talk to a bunch of men like this.

00:39:58.552 --> 00:40:02.972
But this is a safe place and I feel safe here. And when I shouted,

00:40:03.152 --> 00:40:07.912
when I say I shouted, hallelujah, thank you, Lord, that other men see this as

00:40:07.912 --> 00:40:10.432
a safe place that they can come and have conversations.

00:40:10.512 --> 00:40:12.972
This is what God wanted me to do.

00:40:13.452 --> 00:40:20.592
It made me feel so good when I say to hear a man say, yeah, I usually I'm to myself.

00:40:20.792 --> 00:40:25.092
I usually don't have conversations, but the dude has made a place where I really

00:40:25.092 --> 00:40:28.632
feel comfortable to have a conversation and talk to other men.

00:40:28.632 --> 00:40:35.932
And two weeks ago, I had my Friday night show and a gentleman came on,

00:40:36.052 --> 00:40:39.612
a Caucasian gentleman came on because most of my most of the people on my panel

00:40:39.612 --> 00:40:43.252
are African-American men that I have on my Friday night show.

00:40:43.392 --> 00:40:48.252
And there was this Caucasian gentleman in the chat and he came at the wrong

00:40:48.252 --> 00:40:53.132
time and he heard a story of one of the gentlemen talking about him being assaulted

00:40:53.132 --> 00:40:57.432
in a small town that was a sundown town.

00:40:58.216 --> 00:41:04.916
And these four sheriff's deputies that were all Caucasian beat him into a coma.

00:41:04.916 --> 00:41:07.676
And he was telling this story about that.

00:41:07.796 --> 00:41:12.296
And this Caucasian gentleman came into my show and heard that gentleman say

00:41:12.296 --> 00:41:15.296
white men, these four white officers, these four white.

00:41:15.436 --> 00:41:19.936
And he got offended and he wanted to come on and speak on the panel.

00:41:19.976 --> 00:41:23.596
And he came in and he called my show a racist. and

00:41:23.596 --> 00:41:26.356
my shows I feel like these these are my brothers and I

00:41:26.356 --> 00:41:31.116
have to keep them safe because this is my platform and the

00:41:31.116 --> 00:41:35.196
guys that I have in there like ex-military they've

00:41:35.196 --> 00:41:38.176
got PTSD some of them have you know

00:41:38.176 --> 00:41:40.896
disorders where they don't really like to

00:41:40.896 --> 00:41:43.516
be around people they don't really like to talk they're trying to

00:41:43.516 --> 00:41:46.376
like interview so I thought that that was

00:41:46.376 --> 00:41:49.276
going to affect them but I didn't have a show the

00:41:49.276 --> 00:41:52.076
next week but this Friday I had a

00:41:52.076 --> 00:41:56.676
show and they all came back and I apologized to them and I told them I'd never

00:41:56.676 --> 00:42:01.936
let that happen to them again and they were like dude you good you fine that

00:42:01.936 --> 00:42:07.856
guy he was on something else and for them to say they were ready to come back

00:42:07.856 --> 00:42:11.096
they had missed the conversation they wanted to be there.

00:42:12.056 --> 00:42:15.096
Made me feel so good and I just praised God

00:42:15.096 --> 00:42:19.036
and I said thank you so much one of the gentlemen he

00:42:19.036 --> 00:42:21.896
he's married to a german lady and he

00:42:21.896 --> 00:42:27.336
had to go over to germany because her mother died and it was on it was over

00:42:27.336 --> 00:42:31.316
the weekend he had to stay for a while whatever whatever he was like i was in

00:42:31.316 --> 00:42:35.256
germany trying to get on the show man because that's how much i love the show

00:42:35.256 --> 00:42:40.776
but the times were so different and i couldn't get on the show and i'm like me yeah.

00:42:42.476 --> 00:42:46.396
And see here's the thing with that too because

00:42:46.396 --> 00:42:49.376
I have experienced that in everything and

00:42:49.376 --> 00:42:53.876
every piece of work that I've done over the years I don't care if it was the

00:42:53.876 --> 00:42:59.736
advocacy work or the hairstylist they're always going to be an individual or

00:42:59.736 --> 00:43:07.276
group of people that'll try to attack your character or attack the very work that you're doing.

00:43:07.616 --> 00:43:12.936
I recently just had this happen to me with the interview that I've done weeks

00:43:12.936 --> 00:43:14.656
ago. But here's the thing.

00:43:15.978 --> 00:43:20.278
When you know your walk and when you know yourself and when you have confidence,

00:43:21.138 --> 00:43:24.738
what somebody think of me does not interfere with God's plan for me.

00:43:24.898 --> 00:43:25.718
You know what I'm saying?

00:43:26.018 --> 00:43:30.878
Yes, ma'am. I am not going to stop just because you said it out loud.

00:43:31.118 --> 00:43:35.098
That made me more driven than anything because guess what? You didn't even say

00:43:35.098 --> 00:43:37.058
it behind my back. You said it out loud.

00:43:37.278 --> 00:43:41.618
So I'm taking that energy and I'm going to prove to myself that I can.

00:43:41.798 --> 00:43:44.918
It ain't prove it to them, but prove to myself that I got this.

00:43:44.918 --> 00:43:51.398
As much as conflict that I went through, as many times that family and whoever

00:43:51.398 --> 00:43:55.078
said that what I couldn't do or who I couldn't be or who I couldn't achieve,

00:43:55.438 --> 00:44:02.118
I always had it in my heart that it was not about the words of people,

00:44:02.118 --> 00:44:05.058
but it was about the words of God.

00:44:05.298 --> 00:44:08.378
You understand what I'm saying? Because I know my mission.

00:44:09.138 --> 00:44:15.978
I know my spiritual gifts. I know the energy, how I feel when some and people coming to a room.

00:44:16.558 --> 00:44:20.518
You know what I'm saying? Yes, ma'am. I just know what certain energies feel

00:44:20.518 --> 00:44:23.418
like, no matter if it was demonic or angel-like.

00:44:23.518 --> 00:44:26.138
You know what I mean? I am very spiritually connected.

00:44:26.538 --> 00:44:29.458
I remember one time I was doing hair.

00:44:29.558 --> 00:44:33.578
This woman stopped me and said, you are glory carrying. They're scared.

00:44:33.658 --> 00:44:34.678
I don't know, what you talking about?

00:44:34.938 --> 00:44:40.638
She said, no, it ain't bad, but you carry the glory of God on you.

00:44:40.938 --> 00:44:41.618
You know what I'm saying?

00:44:42.318 --> 00:44:44.998
I know what that God ain't mean. You know what I'm saying?

00:44:45.238 --> 00:44:52.478
So that helps me to do this work, to know that, no, I don't have to have the perfect speech.

00:44:52.758 --> 00:44:55.158
No, I don't have to have the perfect words.

00:44:55.518 --> 00:44:59.018
You know, just like, who was it? Moses. God used Moses.

00:44:59.298 --> 00:45:03.998
Yes, ma'am. When he had a speech impediment and God gave him the word,

00:45:04.518 --> 00:45:07.578
surely that's what God is doing for me. Amen.

00:45:08.398 --> 00:45:12.058
Amen. Amen. You're right. So I'm going to continue to thrive.

00:45:12.058 --> 00:45:13.898
I'm going to continue to educate myself.

00:45:14.258 --> 00:45:18.038
I'm going to continue to believe and not put people's fear on me because what

00:45:18.038 --> 00:45:20.718
they fear is they ain't got nothing to do with me. Right.

00:45:21.478 --> 00:45:25.438
Absolutely nothing to do with me. But that is God, that is part of the,

00:45:25.478 --> 00:45:31.518
I'm sorry, that is part of the Satan's plan to attack us through strangers that don't know us.

00:45:31.638 --> 00:45:35.418
But also God's plan is to use strangers to elevate us.

00:45:36.062 --> 00:45:38.882
It goes both ways you know i mean

00:45:38.882 --> 00:45:41.642
that's why i think this podcast that you have is very

00:45:41.642 --> 00:45:44.782
powerful you know it's very driven

00:45:44.782 --> 00:45:47.582
and i absolutely love the fact that you're

00:45:47.582 --> 00:45:50.382
in alignment with god i love the fact that you

00:45:50.382 --> 00:45:53.342
offer this platform for individuals like me to thrive

00:45:53.342 --> 00:45:56.682
i really gonna recommend people your

00:45:56.682 --> 00:45:59.802
way to for you to interview you know i appreciate that

00:45:59.802 --> 00:46:03.102
i need it because like i said i'm at the beginning stages

00:46:03.102 --> 00:46:05.882
god is still working on me i'm still a

00:46:05.882 --> 00:46:09.142
work in progress my platform is still a work in progress and

00:46:09.142 --> 00:46:12.142
i'm always down to have a conversation i'm not

00:46:12.142 --> 00:46:17.022
pushy i'm not i'm i just want to have a real conversation because the world

00:46:17.022 --> 00:46:21.762
is is lacking so many real conversations we're all on my phones we're all on

00:46:21.762 --> 00:46:28.262
social media we're on what you know so just having a simple hour conversation

00:46:28.262 --> 00:46:31.822
with somebody to get to know who they are, where they come from,

00:46:32.002 --> 00:46:37.482
and what drives them is interesting to me because we're not doing this anymore.

00:46:38.642 --> 00:46:41.462
You know, like I said, these other podcasts, they want to talk about,

00:46:41.722 --> 00:46:47.542
oh, what happened on Real Housewives of Atlanta, or what happened somebody sleeping

00:46:47.542 --> 00:46:49.182
with somebody else or somebody doing this.

00:46:49.322 --> 00:46:53.342
I don't have time for any of that in my life. My pursuit is God.

00:46:53.822 --> 00:46:57.162
My pursuit, yeah. I'm talking about health disparities.

00:46:57.582 --> 00:47:01.822
I'm talking about ways that we can bring human services into a better position

00:47:01.822 --> 00:47:10.562
and work and do God's will, understanding the dynamics of social change, social justice.

00:47:11.102 --> 00:47:16.202
That's my language. And my lane is brother, what's going on inside your head?

00:47:16.362 --> 00:47:20.982
Let's fix what's going on inside your head because if we can fix what's going

00:47:20.982 --> 00:47:23.362
on inside your head, the rest of it will follow.

00:47:23.862 --> 00:47:26.882
Yes, I love that. Because if

00:47:26.882 --> 00:47:33.582
you because men And men suffer in silence a whole lot more than people do.

00:47:33.822 --> 00:47:39.282
And that means women, other people. And African-American man suffers.

00:47:39.842 --> 00:47:43.262
And we are one of the most unprotected people.

00:47:45.062 --> 00:47:46.722
African-American women and

00:47:46.722 --> 00:47:50.982
men are very unprotected. But here's the thing with African-American men.

00:47:50.982 --> 00:47:54.482
We are unprotected because the world is beating us down.

00:47:54.482 --> 00:47:59.062
And then there are women, not all women, but there are women that have been

00:47:59.062 --> 00:48:06.702
taught malicious and evil ways by women that have been scorned and been hurt to hurt us.

00:48:07.022 --> 00:48:12.322
So not only do we have to go out into this world and fight the world to try

00:48:12.322 --> 00:48:16.062
to build our own positions in this world, but then there are times when we have

00:48:16.062 --> 00:48:19.302
to come home and fight at home.

00:48:19.342 --> 00:48:22.522
Who wants to fight the world and then come home and fight?

00:48:23.396 --> 00:48:27.756
Right, right, right. I totally agree with that.

00:48:28.016 --> 00:48:34.936
We just want the three Ps, a peace of mind, a piece of ass, and a piece of land.

00:48:37.176 --> 00:48:43.456
You told us the truth. That's it? That's all a man wants in life.

00:48:43.616 --> 00:48:46.856
All a man wants is a peace of mind, a piece of ass, and a piece of land.

00:48:46.996 --> 00:48:50.776
Because with a peace of mind, you

00:48:50.776 --> 00:48:55.056
can send a man out into the world and he will try to conquer it as long as he

00:48:55.056 --> 00:48:58.916
has a peace of mind a piece of ass is going to soothe him when he comes home

00:48:58.916 --> 00:49:03.196
and a piece of land he can develop into a garden or whatever he wants to and

00:49:03.196 --> 00:49:08.056
culture it but with that peace of mind he can develop that land into whatever he wants it to be,

00:49:09.056 --> 00:49:16.316
so it's not it's not hard to to to to have a man be a man but at the same hand

00:49:16.316 --> 00:49:18.296
we've got so many people,

00:49:18.916 --> 00:49:23.036
women, men, whatever, because, excuse me, we live in a world where people date

00:49:23.036 --> 00:49:26.476
whoever they like to date. That's your business. That's none of mine.

00:49:27.476 --> 00:49:34.416
But we live in a world where you have to go by society's norms.

00:49:34.556 --> 00:49:38.856
And it's like me and the wife went out to eat a few days ago,

00:49:38.856 --> 00:49:46.416
and we were at a restaurant eating and the server we had was, he was gay.

00:49:46.756 --> 00:49:51.456
And he was a very great server. I'm not saying, actually, I'm giving him his flowers.

00:49:52.116 --> 00:49:55.976
He was gay. And he was like, and I told him, and my wife was like,

00:49:56.156 --> 00:49:58.096
well, this is my sassy husband.

00:49:58.456 --> 00:50:02.096
That's what she calls me. She calls me her sassy husband because before I met

00:50:02.096 --> 00:50:07.696
her, I had three daughters and I have two smaller daughters that are under the age of 16.

00:50:08.176 --> 00:50:11.716
And I'm a girl dad. And I'm a totally different girl dad.

00:50:11.956 --> 00:50:16.916
I'm a girl dad that has had makeup put on his face and pictures taken of him.

00:50:17.096 --> 00:50:19.496
I've had my fingernails painted numerous times.

00:50:19.696 --> 00:50:23.956
I've had my toenails painted numerous times. I went and got pedicures with my

00:50:23.956 --> 00:50:28.036
daughters and had my toenails painted for weeks under my shoes.

00:50:28.196 --> 00:50:31.756
Never took socks and shoes off. Nobody could see my feet until I wanted to show

00:50:31.756 --> 00:50:35.696
them. But yes, I've had my toenails painted, but I always get them painted blue.

00:50:35.916 --> 00:50:38.856
But I've had my toenails painted. I've had my fingernails painted.

00:50:39.036 --> 00:50:43.156
I've had a tutu on. I've played house party. I've played key party.

00:50:43.336 --> 00:50:44.856
I've played dress-up party.

00:50:45.076 --> 00:50:50.216
I've had weave put on my hair. I've worn wigs. We've had spinning parties and

00:50:50.216 --> 00:50:53.056
contests because I'm a dad.

00:50:54.400 --> 00:50:59.700
To a little girl who needs her dad to be in her life. That's true.

00:51:00.040 --> 00:51:02.380
You got to be present as a brother. That's cool.

00:51:02.740 --> 00:51:09.500
So whatever it takes to be present in my children's life, I'm there. Yeah.

00:51:10.500 --> 00:51:15.560
Sometimes it's hard. Co-parenting can be hard sometimes because my two smaller

00:51:15.560 --> 00:51:20.060
children, they live in another city, but like they're here with me.

00:51:20.240 --> 00:51:24.260
They're here at my house for a month this summer. They're here with me.

00:51:24.960 --> 00:51:32.060
So they're spending a month here with me. I get them twice a month throughout the school year.

00:51:32.240 --> 00:51:35.740
I get them whatever holiday me and them agrees up on.

00:51:36.520 --> 00:51:40.860
But it's just one of those moments like today. They're in a summer camp.

00:51:41.300 --> 00:51:43.920
My wife drops them off. I pick them up in the afternoon.

00:51:44.940 --> 00:51:49.440
I get to the summer camp. They just started a week ago, and my wife was picking

00:51:49.440 --> 00:51:51.720
them up because my job had kind of changed.

00:51:51.720 --> 00:51:57.200
But now I can time has allotted for me to be able to go and pick them up so

00:51:57.200 --> 00:52:01.200
I get there and I'm like yeah I'm here to pick up my two girls,

00:52:01.780 --> 00:52:07.940
and the counselor the little camp counselor lady was like so you're the daddy

00:52:07.940 --> 00:52:11.900
that these girls have been talking about all the time now we put a face to the

00:52:11.900 --> 00:52:16.380
daddy that these children have been talking about my daddy my daddy my daddy

00:52:16.380 --> 00:52:20.640
my daddy and that was one of the proudest moments I ever had as being a father.

00:52:22.140 --> 00:52:26.460
My little girls, they're in love with their father.

00:52:27.500 --> 00:52:34.180
That's what's up. I never had one of those to be proud of. My dad was never in my life.

00:52:35.740 --> 00:52:38.760
So he did two things for me.

00:52:38.920 --> 00:52:45.480
When I had my first daughter, I made a promise to God, her, and myself that I would never be him.

00:52:46.532 --> 00:52:51.912
Yeah. I'd never be him because like you said, that was my mom was in my life,

00:52:51.932 --> 00:52:55.832
but I never had I never had that male role. And I'm a boy.

00:52:56.012 --> 00:52:58.892
So we we need that as as men.

00:53:00.012 --> 00:53:04.292
And I never had a father that was there for graduations. I never had a father

00:53:04.292 --> 00:53:06.312
that would give me the birds and bees talk.

00:53:06.432 --> 00:53:08.652
I never had a father that would teach me how to ride a bike.

00:53:08.812 --> 00:53:10.972
I never had a father that would teach me how to drive.

00:53:11.912 --> 00:53:16.512
So one of the things I tell people all the time is I'm a fatherless.

00:53:16.532 --> 00:53:23.312
Father, searching for earthly father, praising my heavenly father. Yeah.

00:53:24.112 --> 00:53:31.392
Yeah. But I thank God for all the things he's done for me because if I looked

00:53:31.392 --> 00:53:37.192
like everything I've been through, I'd be messed up. Oh.

00:53:37.812 --> 00:53:41.652
I would surely be messed up, but God has brought me a long way.

00:53:41.852 --> 00:53:52.752
He's given me so much that I'm thankful for, that I love, and I couldn't ask for a better father.

00:53:53.252 --> 00:53:56.152
You know, I walked this earth talking about, where's my father?

00:53:56.232 --> 00:53:59.752
Where's my father? He's been above me the whole time, and he's given me all

00:53:59.752 --> 00:54:01.152
these things that I have.

00:54:01.552 --> 00:54:04.772
And I'm not saying that I neglected him in any sorts.

00:54:05.132 --> 00:54:11.812
I've always been very spiritual, but for a long time, I didn't understand the

00:54:11.812 --> 00:54:17.792
ramifications of who he was because I was living in this world as a worldly person.

00:54:18.672 --> 00:54:22.492
And like I said a while back when he told me it was time to surrender,

00:54:22.692 --> 00:54:24.092
when I surrendered, when I

00:54:24.092 --> 00:54:30.072
say when I surrendered to God, it opened up so much abundance in my life.

00:54:30.252 --> 00:54:36.192
It opened up so much abundance in my life that I never go back.

00:54:36.192 --> 00:54:38.032
And I will scream from the mountaintops

00:54:38.032 --> 00:54:43.112
the praise of my almighty Lord and how he has blessed me. Yeah.

00:54:44.156 --> 00:54:55.736
Yeah, yeah. So we are at the point of going. So I've got a few questions for you, Ms. Franklin.

00:54:56.616 --> 00:55:03.896
Okay. Nothing bad, but it's the way I like to end my show with any guest.

00:55:04.716 --> 00:55:11.316
Three questions. Okay. It's all it is is three simple questions. You ready?

00:55:11.856 --> 00:55:16.876
Okay, I'm ready. All righty, the first question is If we were to get in your

00:55:16.876 --> 00:55:20.376
vehicle right now What would be playing on the radio?

00:55:22.896 --> 00:55:27.796
Winning Okay What is that guy's name? What's his name?

00:55:28.256 --> 00:55:36.256
Oh my goodness I have to send you his name But I'll Winning Oh my gosh That

00:55:36.256 --> 00:55:42.516
is so funny Well, let me say this Any other song would be I'd say Brothers Okay, okay Okay.

00:55:43.016 --> 00:55:46.696
So when in the gospel song, but any other time it'd be the eyes of the brothers.

00:55:46.836 --> 00:55:48.116
So you just kind of smooth.

00:55:48.356 --> 00:55:51.316
You just kind of sailing. Yeah. Okay.

00:55:51.896 --> 00:55:59.036
All right. Next question. What is Centuria Franklin's sweet, guilty pleasure? here?

00:56:00.336 --> 00:56:04.776
Oh, Lord, high mercy. What is my sweet guilty pleasure?

00:56:05.616 --> 00:56:12.516
Oh, my goodness. It could be anything. My sweet guilty pleasure is that,

00:56:13.170 --> 00:56:21.430
going to get me a strawberry pie at McDonald's and sitting sometimes in the

00:56:21.430 --> 00:56:23.830
car just cracking up at my own joke.

00:56:26.250 --> 00:56:29.950
I'm a loner. Understandable. Understandable.

00:56:30.430 --> 00:56:36.230
Understandable. So a strawberry pie from McDonald's sitting in the car having

00:56:36.230 --> 00:56:37.830
a conversation with yourself.

00:56:38.550 --> 00:56:43.790
Pretty much about what I got to do. Right, right, right. You're planning.

00:56:43.990 --> 00:56:46.230
You're pre-planning for the day or whatever's going on.

00:56:46.930 --> 00:56:49.110
Yeah. All right. Third question.

00:56:49.910 --> 00:56:57.570
What's your idea of a perfect boo? Man, spouse, person. What's your idea?

00:56:58.170 --> 00:57:00.030
Describe your perfect boo.

00:57:00.690 --> 00:57:06.270
Somebody that dressed nice, crease jeans, great personalities, laid back, cool.

00:57:06.970 --> 00:57:10.350
Don't get on my nerves. Let me be free. Let me be me.

00:57:10.950 --> 00:57:17.010
The house is on peace. we come together we come dynamic with each of our own

00:57:17.010 --> 00:57:23.410
and together we play spades two-hand spades with each other we listen to some

00:57:23.410 --> 00:57:25.930
nasty brother somebody that's cool and laid back.

00:57:27.270 --> 00:57:31.930
Okay i mean and then hey that's your idea of a boo now i actually sang three

00:57:31.930 --> 00:57:36.050
questions to every guest that's been on my show i've had a few women i've had

00:57:36.050 --> 00:57:40.210
more men than i've had women but I'd like to have some more interviews with

00:57:40.210 --> 00:57:42.170
some amazing dynamic women,

00:57:42.890 --> 00:57:48.490
because my platform started off as men, but I'd love to cross over to women

00:57:48.490 --> 00:57:51.870
because I think that women have some stories to tell.

00:57:52.070 --> 00:57:56.530
But I've asked these three questions to every guest that's been on my show.

00:57:56.810 --> 00:58:03.370
And every woman has described physical attributes.

00:58:05.450 --> 00:58:10.290
90% of the men say they just want somebody that has a good heart,

00:58:11.450 --> 00:58:14.410
spiritually down, and things of that nature.

00:58:14.830 --> 00:58:19.650
But I get what you're saying. Everybody has a preference, and everybody has what they want.

00:58:20.410 --> 00:58:24.190
And you basically described, you just said you wanted to have crease genes.